


bigger than the moon

by KatcadeCascade (DreamWings231)



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cannibalism, Canon-Typical Violence, Implied Sexual Content, Multi, Past Violence, Sexual Content, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, They/Them Pronouns for Deputy, Werewolves, Werewolves Turn Into Actual Wolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-03-26
Packaged: 2019-10-18 15:30:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 26,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17583509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreamWings231/pseuds/KatcadeCascade
Summary: No matter what, Rook never regrets leaving the city. Not even when the arrest is warranted and everything goes to chaos. So when Rook's getting hunted down they decide to give into old instinct and shift into the big bad wolf.And then Jacob Seed gets a hold of them. "I'm going to have a fun time taming you."





	1. who cried wolf

**Author's Note:**

> This is totally inspired by a werewolf!rook tumblr post. Also I haven't finished Far Cry so things may be inaccurate.

_The boy who cried wolf, an old tale but it holds truth for a liar._

_Nobody came to help. For who would help a liar?_

_But young Rook is not a liar._

_A wolf, they cry, a wolf is chasing me!_

_The city laughed at them, there is no wolf here, silly child._

_Nobody came to help. For who would help a runaway?_

_The city glared at them, there is no wolf here, stupid child._

_Young Rook ran and cried, once more alone in the cold night._

_The lights of the city cast the shadow of the wolf._

_The wolf is bigger than Rook and bigger than the moon._

_A wolf, Rook cries and runs._

_Nobody came to help. For who would help a thief?_

_Rook the runaway, the thief, the abandoned, and the one who cries wolf._

_The city is too large for the small child but too small for the large wolf._

_The city is too filled with liars that cannot see truth._

_The city is too easy for a wolf to hunt._

_A wolf, Rook sobs and runs._

_Nobody came to help. For who would stop a wolf?_

_Rook the small and lonely ran._

_Rook the hungry and shivering ran._

_Who would be heartless for this child?_

_The city would._

_Who would ignore this child?_

_The world would._

_Who would come to help this child?_

_Nobody would._

_The wolf chased the crier._

_The wolf, bigger than the moon, ran and ran._

_The wolf caught up to Rook._

_Rook stops crying for they are tired._

_No one would help me, Rook said._

_The wolf stands over Rook, bigger than the moon above._

_No one would help you? The wolf asked._

_The words come out unnaturally, speaking like no human ever would._

_The words come out kindly, speaking like no human ever would to Rook._

_No one, Rook dared to repeat._

_Good, the wolf said, no one will hear you cry anymore._

_The maw of the wolf inched closer to Rook._

_You will cry no more, the wolf said._

_You will starve no more, the wolf said._

_You will freeze no more, the wolf said._

_You will never beg for help when you know that no one will come, the wolf said._

_Rook stared at the wolf, too large for the city, bigger than the moon._

_The maw of the wolf nudged their arm._

_You will not cry, the wolf said._

_Rook took a breath and presented their arm._

_You will be bigger than me, the wolf promised._

_Rook did not cry when the wolf bites down._

 

 

The only proof that night existed is the nasty bite mark scarred over Rook’s entire right arm. Punctured marks in a curved pattern marred in a darker pigment of their arm. Overall it’s ugly and Rook keeps it covered.

It’s easy if nobody asks about it, that way Rook doesn’t have to remember the past. But when people like Hudson and Pratt are curious over the rookie, too curious, and see only a sliver of the scar under athletic gauze and ask about it, Rook doesn’t lie.

“A wolf bit me,” Rook shrugged. They gave that same answer to any one that asks. An overly concerned elderly, Rook’s first hook up, many other hook ups, their roommate from the academy, and Rook told only the truth they needed to hear.

“You gotta be kidding,” Hudson said. It’s an expected response that comes and goes.

Rook never lies in their explanation, it just never felt necessary. They never liked lying. All their words used to be ignored _(for who could ignore this child)_ and maybe it was out of spite to not lie _(the city too filled with liars that cannot see truth)_. 

“A wolf bit you,” Pratt said, sounding a bit less doubtful than Hudson, “like on a camping trip?”

“No but I did start going to the woods more after the bite.” Rook likes half-truths, they’re fun.

“Why would you go back, especially after a wolf attack?” Hudson stared at their arm, carefully getting unwrapped.

The summer heat was kicking up a notch, irritating their gauze and well, Rook wanted to see their fellow deputies’ reactions.

Rook hummed to fill in the slow day and settled with one last half-truth. “I always hated the city.” _(The city laughed at them. The city glared at them.)_ “The woods just felt like a better place for me.”

“Right, that’s why you’re here in Montana of all places,” Hudson gave a gentle punch to Rook’s shoulder.

“Totally,” Rook said because otherwise they’ll blurt out how much it sucks to be a wolf in the city.

They had a lot of expectations when their wolf days began and true to the wolf’s _(bigger than Rook and bigger than the moon)_ words, there wasn’t a single moment where they starved.

_(The city is too easy for a wolf to hunt.)_

But Rook couldn’t spend the rest of their life as a lupine. If there’s one lie Rook told, they told it to themselves: life as a wolf was better than being human. There were perks that they could not deny but at the end of each cold night one thing was undeniable.

Rook was still treated like worthless scum, as wolf and as human.

_(Rook the runaway, the thief, the abandoned.)_

They had to stop being a wolf for their life to truly change for the better. One thing for sure, they were leaving the city. It took a lot of work, to readjust their body and to get into the academy. Rook wanted to leave but they wanted to still fight, hunt, and spite the city and every damn person there.

There was always a fleeting thought in Rook’s head, telling them to stay and make the city cry. Maybe they’d find another young Rook and give them the tools to protect their selves. 

_(For who would help a runaway?)_

_(For who would stop a wolf?)_

No, Rook couldn’t be that. Rook couldn’t chase a crier and lie to them.

The wolf of the city has already done a swell job with Rook. Rook who turned on the wolf, who ran away, who never became bigger than the wolf.

Rook remembers the last time they saw the wolf, the night before they left for Hope Country. Rook felt so small.

The wolf, bigger than the moon, always bigger than the city, lowered their head to Rook.

It was the last time Rook cried for the wolf.

They’re too small for the world.

This was just a repeat of their life, feeling small and working and fighting for something better. A new lone wolf set out into the world.

And no matter what, Rook never regrets leaving the city.

Not even when Joseph Seed is warranted for arrest.

By then it has been years since Rook ever thought about shifting. They trained themselves to attack with their guns, to listen and trust Sheriff Whitehorse and his orders even when he himself didn’t want to get on the helicopter.

The events leading to this moment, the rumors about the Seeds, the complaints that range from all over the country but it never gone too explicit or illegal. But then the videos spread like wildfire, of brutally violent religion and drugged hostages and it all happened under the officials’ noses.

Rook almost giggled with hysteria. Of course people at the very top would ignore those at the bottom, all up until something big starts crawling up.

_(For who would ignore this child? The world would.)_

Despite the nervous chill on their skins, Rook got on the helicopter with selfish giggles bubbling within. The duality of emotions rattled Rook’s brain. On one hand Rook hates heights but it pales compared to the fear of the worse for things to come. On the other hand, Rook wants to spite the Marshal who thinks this will be easy, see the look on his face when chaos breaks order. Whitehorse and the rest of them feel it in the air rushing past them, how something is utterly wrong and dangerous as they fly pass the giant statue of the man of the hour.

Joseph Seed stands not with defiance but with a bone deep certainty that he wouldn’t be taken in. He says this while presenting his wrists to Rook.

_(Rook took a breath and presented their arm.)_

Rook took a breath, glanced over to the rest of the Seed siblings, resonated that same certainty, and back over to Joseph.

_(You will be bigger than me, the wolf promised.)_

Rook cuffed Joseph and led him back towards the helicopter. Rook feels so small. Their heartbeat spikes up as the fragile tension in the air finally breaks, slowly then louder and louder with Joseph’s followers becoming frantic and violent.

It gets worst as the helicopter is barely taking flight, as grace is sung, as they’re all crashing down.

Rook feels so small and scared, just like the days before the bite. An ugly little thing inside them is satisfied that this mayhem is happening, that Rook’s instincts were right on the mark and there’s no need to follow rules anymore.

Only one man is currently in perfect clarity throughout the crash and it grates Rook’s nerves more as their friends are in frenzy and then knocked out. 

Joseph Seed tells them what Rook always hears, a lesson they always learn.

Nobody will come to help.

Old instinct has Rook ready to shift, just to spite Joseph with their own chaos. Instead Rook the runaway sees Joey Hudson and Staci Pratt get dragged. It’s the selfish need to survive alone buried over the tactics of regrouping with Burke that gets Rook moving.

Nobody will come to help.

Rook knows this story. Rook hates this story. Rook believes that there’s only one thing left to do.

Before Rook left the city of lies, the wolf said, “I chased you because you were helpless. I bit you because no one would help you. I thought my help might be enough but you seek out a path that I cannot follow. Farewell and remember, you don’t beg for help, you make others cry wolf.”

Rook had to lightly flick the wolf’s nose because hey, as sad as that goodbye was, Rook always hate the cryptic words. Yet they were something to live by, to live up to the challenge of being bigger than the moon.

 

 

 

Rook’s priorities became three things. Help the people of Hope Country, piss of the Seeds, and kill peggies. Oh and stay alive, that’s probably something to note. Guns and other machines were never their preference, it was too grating and loud for the ears but Rook made good use of them.

They never found pride in their kills. From their young age, it was always to survive when they hunted and to a disturbing degree, to not starve. Rook could never stomach the idea of eating the city folk, hunting and killing, yeah that’s more their speed. No one complains when there are a low number of raccoons or birds or aggressive strays in the city and no one thanks Rook’s full belly.

Still, the food Rook gets from the resistance is way better than their days on the streets.

Becoming the deputy to Dutch and the rest of Hope Country is actually the exact opposite of their childhood. Rook can’t be ignored. The resistance sees Rook and anticipates hope and safety, expects it from them. They now have a reputation and there’s expectations put upon them. No pressure. At the same time, the Seed siblings constantly put a target on their head, sending peggies after them. _No pressure._

Unfortunately this means that there are always eyes on Rook. Either it’s getting sniped at or Sharky’s got an arm over their shoulders, planning out their next bombing. And then there’s Dutch on the radio. In the short, intense time being with the man, Rook knows that being off grid will worry the man to death. It kind of warms Rook’s heart. It also prevents Rook from just abandoning all equipment and impulsively wolfing out.

Rook’s never been a liar and they don’t feel like breaking that streak.

The moment comes weeks later when Rook has just barely made a dent in mess that is the Whitetail Mountains. It’s just Rook and Boomer in the woods and Dutch has just called in to say to do everything possible to not get captured by Jacob Seed. From the little Rook seen of the peggies and the resistance here, Jacob is a real big force of nature.

“I’m going to do something impossible to not get caught,” Rook said, hiking to a pretty and tall tree. This one is happily not bloody or blissed. It just reminds Rook of the trees in the city park.

“The hell does that mean Rook?”

“I’m going dark, um, off grid, whatever,” Rook shrugged, hopes that’s transmitting with just their voice. “You gotta trust me. I’m gonna be unavailable for a bit.”

“Whatever you’re planning, kid,” Dutch says and for a split second he sounds solemn, “give them hell.”

Rook turns off the radio and places it on the base of the tree. They won’t need the guns so Rook places them down, kicks some dirt and dead leaves on top so some smart resistance person finds them. Lastly they strip down to the skin. The last article of clothing is the gauze.

_(The maw of the wolf nudged their arm.)_

_(Rook did not cry when the wolf bites down.)_

Shifting starts with a rush, down the brain and spine and into the fingers and toes. Rook twitches out their limbs and while it doesn’t affect the process it makes Rook look all the more creepy as their bones morph. Their bones just deconstruct and rebuilds into a different form. Their mouth stretches out and their jaw unhinges. Their ears get flatter and reshapes to a better location. Fur puffs out from every skin pore as Rook falls into hands and knees. Their favorite part is actually the most confusing part, the tail. The tail bone just grows out with muscles and fur. Then the sensation of their body contorting and morphing, of their organs resizing into new ribs, it stops and Rook howls.

A surprised yelp is choked out by Rook when Boomer joins the howling.

Oh right, Boomer’s here and he just watched the whole thing.

Boomer trots over to Rook, zeroing in to smell the butt. Very much unlike a wolf, Rook punches Boomer which basically means they swiped a paw at Boomer’s nose.

It has been a very long time since Rook was a wolf. Give them a break. In fact when Boomer whines at Rook, they still hear dog noises.

Communicating with other animals is a lot harder than what dog fiction thinks it is. Rook hears the noises they make, sees their posture, or even their scent that hints their emotions. Most of the animals Rook has encountered elude fear because Rook was hunting them as food.  

Trying out their own vocal chords feels rough and even Boomer winces at Rook’s sorry excuse of those squeaky dog noises. After spending a good while reluctantly letting Boomer lick their face, they ran into the woods. The burn in their thighs felt great and the fresh smell of pine is amazing as Rook and Boomer dash through the thick woods. They couldn’t run with this much freedom in the city, too many cars or people, all believing they’re too drunk to be seeing a wolf.

But here there’s no drunken confusion, just loud yelling and bullets getting shot at Rook and Boomer. It’s peggies by the look of it and oh, what fun it is to take them down.

They’ve seen Boomer taken down peggies a good few thousands of times but Rook has more size and blood lust. Rook leaps and tackles a man taller than their usual form, snapping one wrist under their jaws then tearing at the man’s throat. It’s efficient and Rook can’t help but claw at the man’s stomach before moving onto the next peggie. This time Rook starts with her ears and nose and drags her by the ankles until she stops struggles.

Rook tears their teeth and claws into skin, hooks on the bone and makes the peggies scream and squirm. One in particular has a scream too annoying so Rook chomps at the throat and bites out the skin.

This is something Rook truly missed. Reckless abandon to all human morals. Well that was already tossed out the window the moment Rook set foot on Joseph’s compound. Right, that’s why Rook’s here, all of the killing they’ve done, it is justified for survival and yet there’s sick pleasure in just hunting and taking down a bigger target.

Boomer gets their attention once the bloody mess is over. He barks at Rook who has their teeth sunk into a peggie’s nose and slammed the head into the ground. After the second good slam, Rook sees what Boomer been growling at.

Not too strange, there’s a gun aimed at their head. The really big, bigger than the moon, problem is that it’s Jacob Seed holding the gun. Rook didn’t know what to expect, especially not that same glint of absolute certainty in his eyes from the first moment they met.

Jacob Seed grins and takes slow steps towards them.

Immediately Rook drops the corpse’s nose and stalks to Jacob. They sent a look over to Boomer, hoping that for once they’re able to communicate the message of run away. As a loyal dog, Boomer retreats and Rook feels their heart lighten up.

Rook and Jacob circle each other and to Rook’s pleasure, he tosses the gun away and readies his hands. They don’t waste another second to sink in the image of Jacob crouching low, already prepared for Rook’s pounce. Usually, Rook aims for the face but they know that this isn’t a typical fight.

They snap a quick bite to Jacob’s side and claws at his hip and thigh but it’s enough to force Jacob to the dirt. Jacob digs his own fingers into their fur, grabbing on and starts kicking Rook in the gut. Rook snarls loud and bites at his bicep instead, sinking the teeth in till Rook feels blood trickling out their mouth.

Jacob Big Hands McGee, apparently, wow, gets his hand around Rook’s neck and yanks hard. He pries Rook off of him and wraps an arm around Rook’s waist. It’s a tight grip that Rook can’t struggle out of and it’s too late as Jacob flips them over to body slam Rook into the dirt.

There’s a knee digging into Rook’s side and the hand holding their neck down gets a heavier weight as Jacob leans over Rook, staring at their bloody snarl and wild eyes.

“You came out of nowhere, pup,” he said softly with a glimpse of teeth acting as a smile. Rook only heard a few warnings and threats over the radio waves and none of that prepared Rook for hearing the voice directly. It’s the same calm and low tone, sure enough, that’s been in Rook’s head for an unhealthy amount of time but Jacob’s practically purring into their ear.

He chuckles at Rook’s growl and continued struggling to no avail.

“I’m going to have a fun time taming you.”

Jacob takes a trick out of Rook’s game and slams Rook’s muzzle into the bloody dirt a good few times until they can’t compose a thought. They’re barely conscious as there’s a tight grip on their ankles and they’re hauled up onto Jacob’s shoulders.

The last thing Rook thinks is apologizing to Dutch.

 

 

 

The smell of the world awakes Rook up and it is never pleasant. Waking up in alley ways and rooftops are one thing but there’s practically gunpowder and blood in the air. Nauseated and bruised, Rook lifted their head from the pillow that is the ground.

This must be the veterans’ center, Jacob’s home base or something by the looks of it. Plenty of gunmen patrolling the surrounding areas and plenty of people locked up in cages. For Rook they’re more in a pin but with more wiggle room compared to the iron bars holding people lying the ground just like Rook.

All in all, it’s another day in good old Hope Country.

Rook could barely hear a prisoner sobbing over the screaming from possible the other side of the base. Limping over to the barbed wire fence, Rook gets a closer look at the prisoners and wow, they look worse than the homeless community Rook once stayed with.

Starved and skinny like they missed too many soup kitchens. A few of them appear defeated and it’s too familiar to finding that homeless old man just curled up on a park bench after a nasty blizzard. Both are embracing a cold death.

With too many scents in the air – blood, powder, bliss, death – Rook barely recognized the nostalgic scent of another wolf.

A stark white wolf prowls in front of Rook’s fence, the red markings were worn like an insignia of judgement. Rook had felt guilty the first time they saw a Judge and shot them on sight like any other sane person. There’s a glint of disgust and disturbed curiosity in the Judge’s features, scowling but not baring teeth. This one before them stands like they know Rook’s secret.

Already Rook knows they will not be a part of the Judge pack. They knew were ever deemed pack worthy given how many times humans and animals alike never stay too long in their life.

More Judges line up, observing Rook and it takes Rook a pathetically long time to realize, hey this is the first time they met a real, normal-ish wolf.

Much of Rook’s wolfish physicality mimicked the wolf that bit them. They stood half a head taller than the Judges, their dark brown coat is downright poor compared to the snow wolves, and while none are presently aggressive, Rook doesn’t know if they’ve ever met a shifter.

Two in the back appear confuse as they sniff about. They all start communicating in their dog language. It’s a series of nose and ear twitches with occasional audible whines or growls. Like always, Rook feels like an outcast but hey that’s not new, they can already see them plotting. Wait, no this looks like scheming, that’s ruder.

“Looks like you’re all getting along,” Jacob Seed enters the scene and Rook ignores him to stare at Staci Pratt. He looks goddamn freaked out and worst of all conditioned with his hands behind his back and head held low. Staci looks like Young Rook realizing that their life can’t be fixed.

Rook isn’t aware that they stood up suddenly, enough to have a Judge yap at them. It’s enough to get Staci to stop looking at Jacob and meet Rook’s stare. The tiny shiver of fear in Staci is what really breaks Rook’s heart. This is the man that wrangle them into a horror movie and Disney marathon and now he’s probably been through a worst kind of hell.

“Sorry pup,” Jacob interrupts, now standing in front of Staci, “Peaches isn’t your meat,” and again there’s a much more violent shake in Staci’s body. “But if you take him down like how you take down six of my men, I won’t complain.” He looks so proud, announcing Rook’s kills and turns to Staci, “What do you make of this one, Peaches?”

Rook doesn’t know to hope or not for Staci to recognize their eyes, like the months they spent as junior deputy and senior deputy were enough to establish a lifelong bond. That may be too high to hope has there’s still fear and caution and pity on Staci’s face. Rook ignores their heart constricting, moping over Staci acting like the city.

“This one,” Staci manages to say and it’s the voice of a scared child, presenting their arm to a wolf, “is nothing like I ever seen.”

Jacob, flanked by his pack, looks even smugger, “That’s what I like to hear.”


	2. the waiting game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this is where the tags kick in.

The first three days are basically called Wolf Orientation: Jacob Seed Edition.

Rook recalls the many painted walls of _YOU ARE MEAT_ and _CULL THE WEAK_. There’s even a song on the radio dedicated to Jacob taking down sinners. Honestly, the one thing Rook didn’t expect from Montana is for country music being ingrained into them. They still despise John’s theme song. That one sucks.

The true meaning of all that bloody graffiti is a cycle of kidnapping, brainwashing, outrageous trials of hell, and no surprise here, murder. Occasionally Jacob sends weaker soldiers to face off Rook and die trying. Rarely, Jacob gets a fight of his own and wins. It’s more irritating than it is exhausting. The surprise that come in that shouldn’t be a surprise at all is that the Judges get to eat the people that got murdered- sorry, _culled_.

It’s the third day that Rook gives in. Jacob immediately took notice to Rook’s hungry strike with a tight grip to their new iron collar, he told his Miller story.

He made the story sound almost poetic the first time, how the brothers he made during the war were sacrificed for a bigger purpose and it falls onto Jacob to be strong, to cull the weak that rots the world and it is their role to be culled. Rook’s not over the whole cannibal part that was partially glossed over. Yet over those two days without food, the only thing entering Rook’s body was Jacob’s voice and the terrible idea that hey, they’ve eaten stray dogs and cats before. A dead human would be no difference.

On that third day, Rook runs past the Judges taking their time to the pile of the culled and starts chowing down. It’s just like the first time they hunted and ate a wild bird, Rook thinks, it’s gross and someone has done this before and it’s necessary and this is probably what the wolf meant when they said that Rook will no longer starve. The last thing Rook thinks is that this satisfies the ache in their stomach.

It was only two days without food. Rook has spent weeks surviving on crumbs, why is this ache so much worse?

The answer stands behind Rook, chuckling, “About time pup. Now it’s time to prove you’re one of mine.”

Rook doesn’t look at Jacob immediately like the other wolves, they scoff up the rest of the meat – there’s barely a passing thought of sorry to the dead – and finally turns to Jacob, blood drooling out between their teeth.

Behind Jacob, like always, like a pet, is Staci and he’s holding a small radio with athletic gauze tied like a bow around it. It’s the gauze that both he and Rook are paying close attention to because Rook, the sentimental fool that they are likes to scribble down _‘bigger than the moon’_ onto the ends of it.

Jacob, without looking at him, holds out his hand. “Peaches,” he warns when Staci takes a second too long to give up Rook’s radio. “This belongs to the Deputy.” Somehow, Rook hears that title as a pronoun. “Track them down.”

All the Judges take a good long sniff of the doohickey. To the human eye they don’t notice the wolves doing a double take. Collectively, they all stare at Rook.

Jacob and Staci and the other soldiers watching are all so completely baffled that Rook does not hesitate to laugh at them.

A laughing wolf shifter sounds like a mix between a soft bark, a newbie trumpet player’s first note, and math the embodiment of agony. Also there’s still blood dripping on Rook’s face and munched on dead bodies behind them.

Oh, Rook wishes this moment lasts forever but Jacob snaps out of it and tasks Rook to hunt down the Deputy. Great now Rook’s thinking in the third person.

Thus, Rook leads a good number of strong cult members to their doom.

They lead the merry men down a random direction, for some reason they smell burgers, wow that man meat is really messing with their head, and they’re going to wing it. Finally they decide to stop here; it’s a small treeless patch in the forest with a few big rocks.

To get into character, Rook dramatically stops and hunches their body low to sniff the ground. They’re a small possibility that Rook raised their tail up like one would raise their fist to indicate their team to stop. The soldiers do so, thankfully, and Rook tries to look convincing as they lick a rock like a goat would. It tastes just as anyone can expect and no, Rook will never crave this.

One soldier gets impatient and even yells at Rook to get on with it. Rook decides, yeah okay, you asked for it, buddy.

Rook launches at the soldier in the side, knocking the gun out of the way and riffs the ear off. They don’t waste time and pounce to the next person. Guns are wiring off and being this up close, a few do get Rook’s legs before they taken down three more soldiers. On the fourth person, Rook aims their teeth to dig into the eye sockets and that’s when Rook sees one man running away, speaking into a radio.

They make eye contact as Rook spat out an eye.

In that moment of fear and hesitation, an arrow hits his heart. Calming down, Rook notices there’s been a lot more arrows fired at this little brawl. They must have been too into the fight to be aware an archer’s been helping Rook’s ass and ended the fight.

Rook smells her, she’s so far away and there’s too much blood surrounding Rook to locate her immediately. There’s a flash of a dark hooded figure behind a tree that’s at the top of the forest’s incline.

Dutch always spoke fondly of his niece. They have to remember to thank Jess Black once this is over.

She must have left because there’s no rain of arrows when reinforcements run in. Before Rook could move, either to attack or run - they don’t know what their instincts are or priorities are anymore - one of them shoots a blissed arrow at Rook.

Rook’s vision fades to black before they hit the ground.

 

 

 

Instead of a wired pin, Rook wakes up in a cage.

Jacob isn’t there when they wake up. It scares Rook that they’re disappointed about that. They’re ignored by the rest of the camp, all alone in a cage. It’s like the first time Rook got boxed up.

It was winter and there was a bookshop with a small café inside. No one paid any mind to the small child getting away from the cold and they were too busy in their books or the fresh batch of cookies. There was someone reading in a large chair, their nose in a book and on the side table was a paper bag full of cookies.

The reader was too engrossed with their book to eat and Rook thought they’re wasting time; the cookies were losing their warmth. They smelled so good and no one was looking. Rook, out of impulse, out of hungry, went behind the chair and pinched the edge of the paper bag. They slide it slowly off the table and into Rook’s awaiting hand.

They were so warm and it made Rook so calm and that’s when Rook’s stomach growled.

People looked up and then back down to their books, thinking everything was normal. It took everything in Rook’s small body to not run out the door like a lunatic. It took so much patience to walk out the door and into the cold where the warmth of the cookies died out.

Rook was able to shove one cookie in their mouth, in complete bliss and in complete defenselessness as a group of kids and teenagers walked down the sidewalk and saw Rook. It took one look at Rook’s ragged shirt, too big shoes, and giant but flimsy coat to know that cookies don’t belong in this picture.

The taller kids, older by the looks of up, pushed Rook against the door. One snatched the cookies away, another started taunting Rook, and when things got violent, nobody came to help.

Rook saw the eyes inside the bookstore, looking up and looking back down, thinking everything was normal because yes, this is normal.

Fighting the kids was hard but none of them has the desperation that Rook has nor their dirty tricks of spiting into eyes or biting the noses, cause that’s Rook’s signature move. They scratch up some faces but they’re out numbered and then gets hoisted up no matter the struggling and squirming.

They toss Rook into the garbage dumpster of the bookstore. It smells terrible and Rook can’t push the lid open, there’s something shoved on top. Exhausted and hungry, Rook doesn’t give up and keeps at it for what feels like hours until what appears to be an old TV falls off, freeing them.

It happened so long ago and there were more times where Rook stole food and got caught by the wrong people or ignored by the right people. That starvation and growing desperation is back as Rook is caught and ignored for, maybe, fifteen days in that cage.

Rook stopped bothering to bark or whine by then. So when it’s nighttime and someone approaches, they snap up and growls lowly. They had to be ready for a fight, that’s all Rook knows. They regret it when they realize Staci is standing outside their cage and holding a bowl of meat sludge.

Instantly, Rook plots their butt down and wags their tail. They hope that’s enough to gain Staci’s trust. That dumbfounded look from before is back on Staci’s face but he kneels to Rook and slides the bowl inside.

Rook wanted to press their nose to Staci’s hand but he snapped it away, cradling it like Rook bit it. This is when Rook tries to pull off sad whimpering, it’s genuine and a bit awkward but they do it while pouting at Staci to hopefully convey guilt.

Staci looks very, very confused and uncomfortable. He whispers, “Go eat already, it’s uh rabbit by the way.”

In that case and shoving away the thought that Staci’s lying about the type of protein, Rook digs in. Again there’s a look of horror aimed at Rook as they wolf down, hah, the food and lick the bowl clean.

When Staci makes the move to take the bowl away, Rook takes their chance to nuzzle into Staci’s hand. As expected, he freezes up but slowly Staci gives his hand into the deep, tangled fur of Rook’s neck. It’s nice for the both of them if they’re downplaying how touch starved Rook feels.

They recall the first time Staci hugged Rook. Rook won a bet against Joey, a risk by the way, but they were right on how Sheriff Whitehorse would react to eating a marshmallow for the first time.

Rook misses the boring days, where it was just handing out speeding tickets or stopping bar fights or filing a complaint about the Seeds before they were mildly dangerous. Most of all, Rook missed the moments with Staci and Joey and how they actively engage in Rook’s life. They knew the smaller bits of Rook’s childhood, either from a background check or their own suspensions so they got Rook into TV shows and books because nothing extreme was going to happen in Hope Country of all places. They had time to teach Rook about trust and fun.

The moment gets interrupted, of course, by Jacob, _of course_.

“Peaches, what are you doing to the big, bad wolf?”

Staci practically curls into himself and, still on his knees, lowers his head more to Jacob. Rook has half the mind to bark at Jacob but they trust Staci and followed his lead.

Jacob hums, for once it’s not _Only You_ but it sends a chill down their spine. He walks up to them ignoring Staci – good – and opens the cage. There’s a leash in his hand and Rook simply accepts it, they’re too tired even with the food consumed and they’ve fought Jacob plenty of times to know they don’t want to risk another broken rib.

He leads Rook into the veterans’ center and up to the more guarded areas, all the way to what seems to be Jacob’s room. There’s a desk with a map and a radio, a locked gun case off to the side wall, and a large cot. 

“I think Peaches has the right idea,” Jacob sits on his bed and with how short the leash is Rook’s sitting by his knees. “You did your punishment and now you need something soft.”

There’s a hand on Rook’s head and they barely process that they’re getting pats and fingers are combing away the furred knots and wow, that’s really nice, and _why is this happening?_

“Good puppy.” He coos and if Rook wasn’t enjoying this so much they would’ve bit him. Light touches on their head roam around and it’s weird to think that this soft gesture comes from a man that brings excruciating amounts of pain to the world. The fingers scratch behind Rook’s ear and it torments them how their leg is thumbing happily. “You like that don’t you?”

This plays out for the next few days, Rook’s on a tight leash by Jacob’s side as either a weapon or as a pet. Rook’s always been a weapon. They don’t know what to think about being a pet, like the literal sense of the word and not the kink for it.

The best and worst part of this is that Rook and Staci have basically the same role to follow Jacob everywhere. If Rook had to guess, they think Staci’s been in this position since the start which means a couple of things. Jacob doesn’t see Staci’s potential and believes that this power dynamic will enforce Staci will never grow.

_(You will be bigger than me, the wolf promised)_

Now that is something that Rook can’t accept.

Rarely does Jacob let Staci go to other cult things, Rook hasn’t paid much attention on that side of plot, and Rook is leashed to Jacob’s side. The best that they can do is nuzzling into Staci’s side before he’s dismissed. Staci always looks panicked since Jacob is right there but so far Jacob hasn’t dissuaded or punished them.

He just looks mildly amused but when Rook doesn’t imitate any nuzzling with him, Jacob looks almost ticked. This is fun.

Things become a little off beat when the Judges are all rounded up with Jacob holding the radio out to them again. Some time when Rook didn’t see, the gauze was untied and one sniff told them that Staci has it bind around his wrist.

Like last time, the Judges are kaput and stare at Rook.

They don’t bother laughing or even attacking this time as it is Jacob leading the hunt and still keeps them on a leash. No tricks would work so Rook settles with something solid and leads Jacob, Staci, and the other soldiers to the tree where Rook toss their clothes at.

The guns and med kits are gone but no one wanted to pick up battered old clothes. Rook didn’t even realize that there’s old dried blood on the Pokémon shirt. This one’s their favorite, the Rye’s threw it over their head and Rook wore it up until the wolf came out.

Rook brings the shirt over to Jacob to show hey, this is a dead end.

Jacob doesn’t take too kindly to this situation as he just grasps the cloth and shoves it in his knapsack. He signals his men to move out, there’s a rumored Whitetail Militia lookout camp around here and Jacob wants the weak culled.

Some murder time and kidnapping later, Staci and Rook share a look of regret and quiet angry. Rook nuzzles into Staci’s hand as they walk back to the center.

The real problem is Jacob after sending the new slaves-with-jobs into the trials. He stands over his map, and since he’s not using the chair, Rook hops on and sees him writing down Rook’s last known locations. There’s a bunch of other markings that’s aligns with Rook’s garbled memory of pissing off John and getting on Faith’s nerves. For Jacob, there are six markers bordering his sibling’s terrain.

“I thought maybe the Deputy got scared off and ran but there hasn’t been any sighting of the Deputy in the other areas,” Jacob slides his finger on the map, starting with Joseph’s compound, then to John’s and Faiths, and lastly the little area Rook explored of the Whitetail Mountains.

“They’ve drove John mad,” he said fondly. “All the reports describe them as cunning, reckless, a brute, and as an unstoppable force of nature.” These has to be the nicest things Rook has ever heard, it almost warms their heart. Jacob scowls as he taps the marked tree spot, “Now they won’t show their defiance to me.”

Yeah because that’s the issue here, the Seeds have been radioing in for a Deputy update. John’s a lot pricklier knowing that Rook ran to Jacob’s territory and never came back. Faith more or less mopes that Rook might not be Blissed out without her knowledge. Jacob appears on edge from anticipation of a fight with Rook but there’s a lot of expectations getting let down.

Rook doesn’t know what to do. They’ve never been wanted or needed before. While being Jacob’s wolf isn’t a dream, Rook has a feeling that duking it out as a human will be a lot more fast paced and intense.

This is the waiting game. No going forward and no going back, not dying and not living, and most of all no contact with the one you’re waiting for.

It’s the Miller story all over again, waiting for an idea or an opportunity but never waiting for help.

_(You will never beg for help when you know that no one will come, said the wolf)_

There’s a knock on the door and it’s just food delivery. Two bowls of mystery meat and a spoon. Jacob whistles for Rook to get off his chair as he sets their bowl down. Like always, Rook doesn’t want to eat because they knew that prisoners die practically every day here. The wolves are expected to see meat as meat and on days where Rook is exhausted, they give in.

Today Rook hesitation is longer due to it not being Staci delivering the food, which is a concerning oddity to Rook’s paranoia. At Jacob’s snort, Rook looks up at him. He’s still going over the map but he sends them a smile.

“Hey, it’s bear.” Jacob raises his bowl but Rook stays put. He rolls his eyes and kneels down to them, and then he picks a small piece of Rook’s meal and eats it. “Bear,” he repeats and rubs Rook’s head.

When he returns to the map, Rook is gobbling up their bowl.

 

 

 

They don’t quite know what’s the plan is or was. The intention of all of this was to hide out as a wolf in Jacob’s territory and shift back into a human some time later.

Rook knows that the real reason was the freedom of being a wolf. They selfishly wanted to get away from this far cry of a game Hope Country morphed into. It was old instinct that needed exercise, it was the want for carnage that no human hands can do, it was Rook thinking that this is what bigger than the moon meant.

That phrase means nothing and everything to Rook. It was how Rook thought of the first wolf shifter, how they guided Rook into becoming a wolf and surviving on the streets better than imagined. They even let Rook call them Pluto.

_(Why? The wolf asked)_

_(Pluto is a moon, said Young Rook, right?)_

_(The wolf hesitated)_

_(It is considered a planet now, the wolf said)_

_(You do know I do not keep up with this stuff, said Young Rook)_

_(The wolf, Pluto, rolled their eyes and accepted their new name)_

Rook misses them but they really don’t want Pluto to see the situation they’re in. They’re mostly been watching Jacob’s slow rage get tested against his soldiers. He’s pushing for more scouts all over and even threaten Rook over the radio to make their existence known.

No one dares to inject the idea that the Deputy might be dead. Well, one person tried and got culled.

During this, Rook finally got unleashed. This actually changes nothing other than Rook can hang out with Staci when everyone else is busy or dying. Whenever Staci is even remotely sad, which is all the time, Rook gets him to sit down with them in his lap. Petting Rook usually gets Staci to smile. He still has the gauze wrapped like a bracelet.

The weird part is that Jacob still calls Rook to his room. They think it’s because none of the Judges accepted Rook into their den, it’s actually just a bunch of old and scrappy beds lumped behind the center. The other wolves no longer growl at Rook but just stare and stare and it feels so awkward that the humans can feel it.

It’s like socializing with teenagers all over again.

Repressing those uncomfortable memories of being a teenaged werewolf, Rook settles with Jacob’s cot just fine. It’s a slow day of culling, murder, and hearing radio reports of the resistance doing just fine without Rook. Today is when things get complicated.

Even though Rook knows that this is Jacob’s room with his guns and maps and the bed Rook’s on, they failed to notice a lack of any clothes.

They only realize this when Jacob places his trusty army jacket on the bed, probably not for Rook to lay on top of, and leaves the room only to come back butt naked.

 _Wow_ , Rook thinks.

There’s a logical explanation running through the background of their mind. There being only communal showers here, limited water because that’s the soldier way, and Rook has also spend months in the same clothes every day and night without wash. It’s unhygienic and a bad habit but that’s how Rook lived other than skinny dipping. It appears that Jacob is the same way, why waste water when you’re just going to get dirty and bloody again.

But meanwhile in the foreground in Rook’s head, wow is heard on repeat.

Jacob is a big man so it makes sense that he’s big all over.

“Oh there it is,” he said casually and pulls the jacket right from under Rook, sending them to the floor. “That’s what you get,” he teases and leaves, still naked even with the jacket pulled on.

Rook barely attempts to speak. The vocal chords and jaw just don’t match perfectly to human communication. But this is a special case and Rook’s quiet howl barely passes as “Wow.”

So things got complicated to _complicated_ as Rook buries their head underneath the cot to forget the size and shape of Jacob Seed’s dick and ignore the heat in their face and in their nether regions.

This is disastrously embarrassing, being aroused while in wolf form. Rook will not go into detail. They can’t. They do not want to get hot and bothered in their wolf body! That part is more mortifying than the fact that the sight of a nude Jacob Seed is what started it all.

Listen, before the helicopter there was a sit prep with Marshal Burke going over the Seed family like he knew them better than Whitehorse. Rook saw one picture of the Seeds and thought, wow, what a snack. Then during the fateful arrest, Rook stood before them and thought, don’t fuck with crazy, no matter how hot they are.

Now all that Rook can think is the word fuck but with the inflection of being sexually frustrated and totally not as the verb involving Jacob Seed.

Why is this arousing crisis falling onto Rook now? Well maybe it’s because Rook hasn’t gotten laid since getting here or that it’s been Jacob who’s been giving scratches and rubs and rough wrestles. Given the circumstances, Rook’s not getting killed but this is a new kind of torture.

Rook spends about let’s say a minute to think on how to get rid of their dilemma. Keep in mind that they are still in Jacob’s room, half way buried under the cot, and still in wolf form and steadily getting hornier. Also the scent of Jacob Seed is in the air, a predominate factor, and every moment Rook stared a little too much at him is getting repeated in their head.

If Rook wills this away or ignores it, Rook knows that they’ll only be more hectic because usually Rook doesn’t want to ignore it. They just take care of the arousal in the first secluded and decently clean spot they can get. It helps that the city just ignores them.

But here with Rook slowly growing tempted and desperate and oh also alone, Rook really wants to just give into pleasure. They end up doing so, no not as a wolf, they do not want to open that can of worms.

Instead Rook does the crazy thing of shifting back into human form, that full body shudder of fur sinking into sweaty skin, and gets off in Jacob Seed’s bed. For some reason, that makes Rook sweat hotter.

When it’s over, Rook is smart enough, and perhaps for their own punishment, to shift back to being a wolf and not relax in any sort of afterglow. The mess they made ended more on their body so Rook’s back to looking like a dirty wolf and if they’re fast enough, no one will give them a second glance as they dashed out of the building.

There’s a small water tank outside for emergency fires – this is smart, really, due to the amount of explosions Rook has caused – and Rook is able to push the small valve to start the hose. Once wet but clean, Rook turns the water off and that’s when Rook sees that the Judges are watching.

A small twitch of their nose tells Rook that’s still a lingering musk of desire that only a wolf can smell.

Rook’s honestly had enough of these guys and does the best they can do deliver a middle finger. They flick a paw out under their chin. This has been a combination of American and Dog Sign Language, Pluto would be so proud.

Alright, Rook is sated, a little bit pissed at the Judges, mad at this whole damn war over bullshit religion, and energized by how crazy their life is.

Werewolves are real, Rook is a shifter, they just masturbated in the enemy’s bed, and goddamn does Rook itch for a fight.

They prowl over to the trial grounds, the latest batch are as wild as expected. Once their eyes lock onto the wolf, Rook wants to make them cry.

Nobody will come to help them, the wolf thought. One man doesn’t have time to raise their gun as Rook jumps them. Rook goes for the arm, nails their teeth into the skin and yanks the body back and forth, dragging him through the dirt. He’s screaming and crying and Rook loves the sounds of it.

A crowd forms around Rook and the victims they target. They cheer and holler and place bets on how long each human will last with the big, bad wolf. A few of them boo when they realize that Rook’s not here to kill, they’re here to play.

They just want the rush of a fight, a nasty brawl where the loser is crawling away, fearful of Rook. Too many times Rook either dragged someone by their limbs or clawed the torso or stomped the head into the dirt.

Everything ends when Jacob Seed enters the ring of fire and there’s that smug look again. He says something about Rook, about how it’s a cute way to train the weak, but it’s all just human garble that Rook doesn’t want to understand. All Rook sees is a bigger battle, bigger than the moon worthy.

Jacob’s the one to act first, tackling the wolf and wrangles a hand to hold down Rook’s muzzle. Rook is able to kick the monster of a man off but not before scratching at the army jacket. It still lingers with their scent, mixing in with Jacob’s. Rook growls, the vigor to fight renewed.

The man laughs, it’s so much more definite to Rook’s ears while the crowd is just muddled noise.

Two of them circle each other and as they stare into each other’s eyes, just like the first time they fought, and they just think _NOW_ and they both run to meet the other in the middle.

The waiting game is over.

The wolf uses their teeth, their claws, and sheer will to keep fighting, to spite this man. The man uses his hands, elbows, knees, thighs, and feet - okay a lot of body parts - and more importantly he fights like it is his purpose.

Rook fights to survive, to ensure that this primal need to fight and spite others is burning only so that Rook is in control of their life. It’s a different story for Jacob. He fights because everything is uncontrollable and they need to be set into place.

This is chaos and order, two different needs that counter each other.

But one force can overweight the other. At the end of the day, at the end of this moment, Rook ran and ran and fought and fought and there’s so much blood and noise and even though people and wolves are around them, Rook is still an outcast. They feel so small.

Rook feels the phantom pains of the city pulse with the battle wounds of Hope Country. There are echoes of fights and cries and howling and the helicopter crashing that grind harshly on Rook’s brain until there’s only fuzz coating their eyes.

It’s all nothing and everything and Jacob wins.

Rook’s too exhausted to remember how, just feels their bones turn to jelly and there are aches and cuts burning with pain. They remember getting lifted upon Jacob’s shoulders and then getting placed on their cot.

Light touches drift around Rook’s body and they feel safe knowing that it’s Jacob that’s taking care of them. They feel so small here, sinking into their mind as sleep becomes stronger than anything in the big, big world.

Sleep, as powerful as it is, can be easily broken.

In the softest of voices that only Jacob Seed can convey, he asked, “What the fuck?”

Rook’s body still hurts and their eyes wince at the sunlight beaming in. They cover their eyes with their hands, fingers rubbing, and-

Oh.

This is how Rook wakes up, human and nude, in Jacob’s bed with him laying besides them and staring at Rook like they’re bigger than the moon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite like would be 'Werewolves are real, Rook is a shifter, they just masturbated in the enemy’s bed, and goddamn does Rook itch for a fight.' This has been a good time. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	3. bond

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)

Rook never really thought about telling their secret to anyone because there was no one close to them. In the city of lies, no one cared for the people living on the streets but for the people within that casted off community, well Rook doesn’t call them family. Or more specifically, Rook doesn’t think they are the type of person to be considered as family.

Those who are abandoned somehow find others with the different story but the same ending. They have seen a lot of stories from the people the city ignores.

The story of Rook the runaway, the thief, the abandoned is the same story for a bunch of other kids too. They’re all different in their own ways but Rook is the one that got bitten by a wolf.

When asked how Rook got the bite wound, they told the truth. Whether the kids believed them or not didn’t matter and Rook didn’t feel like telling the part about being a wolf shifter. If Rook thinks back to those days, there may have been a few times someone saw Rook shift into a wolf or a wolf shift into Rook but there’s always the smell of alcohol in the air.

This is the city of lies after all and Rook does not want to be a part of it.

So imagine Rook’s predicament of waking up naked in Jacob Seed’s bed and, wait a minute, was he cuddling them throughout the night?

Waking up and realizing they’re back in human form, Rook sees Jacob, unfairly fully clothed, by their side with an arm across Rook’s middle. There’s not a chance to consciously enjoy the warmth before Jacob swings his body on top of Rook and pins their arms to the bed.

“Where’s my pup?” He demands with a look of protective anger and Rook feels oddly touched. Like in their heart but also literally with Jacob’s knees slotted against their hips and his legs laying heavy on Rook’s and his rough hands holding down Rook’s wrists.

This is too much sensory for Rook to take, it’s overwhelming now that Rook’s back as human but still processing smells and touches as a wolf. All they can do is classify Jacob Seed as alpha.

It makes sense that Rook panics right?

It’s just that when they panic this duality happens.

Very vaguely, Rook remembers that one time Joey showed them a Mexican cartoon where a kid spins his belt buckle to be a superhero or supervillain. Anyway, at one point his super transformation gets interrupted and so he was in a mismatch combination of his civilian and super attire.

Yeah, Rook’s living through that mismatch rush right now.

The tingling sensation of shifting buzzes in their skin and bones but it’s not spread evenly over Rook’s body. Instead Rook feels their ears fluff up and reshape, their hands retain their bone structure but they’re furred and padded with sharp talons, the feet do morph fully into a wolf’s with fur trailing up the legs, and the tail comes out but it’s still trapped under their back.

At least Jacob isn’t angry anymore, that’s a plus. He does look super-duper shocked and confused and Rook can’t blame him.

“Um,” Rook tests out their voice, so far human, “hi?”

Jacob is still on top of them but he leans back, still sitting on their legs but now Jacob’s holding the furred wrists and studying them. Carefully, Rook tries to properly sit up and free their tail. It was starting to tingle with the lack of blood flow. Jacob sees it wag and that’s when Rook sees the man lose all his resolve.

“Deputy, you, what, you’re, you were just,” Jacob fumbles over his words, new sentences interrupting each other. “You’re in by bed?”

“Yeah and you were spooning me,” Rook said, uncomfortable that this is really happening.

He falls silent when he takes another look to Rook’s arms and sees the bite mark. In this half shifted form, fur doesn’t grow over it. Jacob glides his hand from their wrist to the scar, tracing gently at it. Not many people want to touch it, from Rook’s experience. Either it was just intimidating or gruesome to the reactor but Jacob is familiar to scars and wounds.

“This sure wasn’t in your file,” he said, likely meaning the shifting thing because John would threaten to write wrath on the mark. After him, Faith would try to coax Rook into remembering their street life and how they need the same guidance Joseph provided her.

“Honestly I have no idea how nobody found out or if they did they never told me,” Rook said. “For you guys though, it’s creepy you dig into my history but at least you’re using my pronouns.”

“There are not a lot of records on you,” Jacob stops rubbing the scar and looks to Rook’s ears, “You’re still a mystery. Between you running from the fifth orphanage to entering a proper school system, it was all blank.”

“Okay for the record,” Rook states, pissed off at the city, “I ran off before they kicked me out and I wasn’t the only one. Most of us got kicked out just because we aren’t straight or not our assigned gender.”

Rook is fully aware that they’re growling. What they weren’t aware of is Jacob bringing his hands to both ears and caressing the furred cartilage. One hand starts scratching behind their ear and oh, that’s nice.

“Stop,” Rook whines, border lining on dog squeaks.

“But you like this,” he teases and now both hands are scratching the area around behind the ears and nape of the neck. While Rook is lost in the touch, they barely hear Jacob say, “The army can be like that too or send us on a suicide mission.”

It’s true that the Seeds have all tried to dig into Rook’s backstory in a reverse psychology way but none of them ever touched Rook’s sexuality or gender identity.

_(The city laughed at them)_

_(The city glared at them)_

_(The city ignored the children of runaways and the abandoned)_

This was something that made certain homeless kids latch on to each other. It was the closest thing to friendship for Rook since Rook still ran away from them. Rook had to remember that their feelings and fears are valid but they just felt so alone for simply identifying as queer for sexuality and genderqueer.

It’s a complicated or maybe even hypocrite bundle of thoughts and fears that wrecked Rook’s brain when they first tried to explain their selves to the kids who would listen. How often does a person try to explain their soul? Specifically the way they don’t feel comfortable with either binary gender or how identifying as bisexual or pansexual or asexual doesn’t feel quite on the mark but the word queer does. They feel so small in this already small world.

The scratching sensation stops and Rook feels warm hands holding their face up.

“Pup, your mind is wandering.” The hands lightly slap Rook’s face and Jacob is speaking so soft.

Rook inhales sharply and reacts similarly by shoving Jacob off the bed. He tumbles to the floor and Rook wills away the fur and talons with the buzz of shifting back to be completely human. They stretch their fingers out and wrap the blanket around their shoulders like a cloak.

They can’t really think of anything to say or if they should just return to their wolf form but after shifting this much in at least twenty-four hours really taxes on their muscles. Their body just reshapes and mildly this really freaked Rook out, especially with testing if Rook could shift to be more comfortable as genderqueer.

Jacob starts laughing, a bit out of breath at first but turns into bellowed laughs. “I’ve been searching for you and you’ve been right under by nose, Pup!”

“You do know my name right?” Rook snaps, flushing at the nickname. Apparently it stuck too well.

“After all this,” he waves his hand in a circle, “you’re still my Pup.” At their scowl Jacob raised one good counter, “It’s better than when John tried to find your birth name.”

“Well Johnny Appleseed failed at that!” Rook flailed their arms under the blanket and had to readjust it again, “It’s my dead name, it doesn’t represent me.”

“And Rook does?”

“It just caught on fast,” they shrugged.

“So,” Jacob stands up, hands on his hips and looking down at Rook, “This is your master plan. Infiltrating my base, taking down my men, unsettling my Judges and all while at my side and I never knew it was you.” There has never been a moment where Rook liked the look of that smug face of Jacob Seed. “I wasn’t aware you were this eccentric just to get into my bed.”

Rook inhaled, grabbed a pillow and screamed into it.

Oh god, it does look like that doesn’t it.

“Why are you still hiding yourself?”

Rook hugs the pillow to their chest and glares at Jacob. He’s done teasing at least but the question still digs deep because Rook doesn’t have an answer. “I don’t know. This never really happened, not the whole waking up in bed naked thing but the uh, wolf reveal.”

“Well I’m honored to know about your little secret.”

“Don’t be,” Rook said, “I once shifted in front of a rude hot dog guy and ate all his goods.” Jacob’s mouth almost twitched into a smile but he’s keeping up a stoic face. “He ran off to the closest liquor store to forget. This other time I was staying in some abandoned apartment and I heard a bunch of college kids sneak in thinking the place is haunted. So I stood in the middle of the room as still as possible and they starting doubting if they saw me and once the flashlight hit my face I shifted my head to be wolfish and howled at them! They ran off screaming and tripping over each other!”

There’s the smile Rook is fishing for.

“Pup,” he says and it’s more like he said it out of habit as Jacob pauses and starts again, “Deputy, you’re a wolf?” The delay in mind freaked has finally ended so Rook pats the bed to get Jacob to sit. “I saw you just change and the Judges feared you and,” Jacob looks at Rook, all bundled up in his blanket and clutching a pillow, “and you’re not killing me.”

Not subtle at all, Rook side glances to the table where Jacob left a pistol and back to Jacob. “What can I say, we have a bond.”

“You’re just buttering me up, pup,” Jacob said. “You’re the front person of the resistance and my best wolf. You can’t be both, Rook.”

They know that. They’ve been in Jacob’s hands like it’s the weirdest vacation ever. Like before, Rook has to know that being a wolf won’t change their life. They left the city and entered Hope Country as human. They entered Jacob’s life as both wolf and human and now they have no idea on how to leave.

Rook the runaway always had a reason to run.

Rook the thief always did what it took to survive.

Rook the abandoned always expected to be alone and small.

They aren’t these titles anymore as Rook flops on to their side, curling into a ball. Even with the blanket tugged over their head they still felt Jacob staring. He’s asking the right questions without saying it. What is Rook’s plan or their loyalties?

This isn’t the city of lies where Rook’s kills are ignored. Everything is set to the extremes. The resistance wants to put an end to the Eden’s Gate and the Seeds want people under their thumb and murder is all on the table. Rook feels so small with all this noise and expectations and consequences.

Ultimately, Rook has to pick a side.

Before Jacob could touch them through the blanket, Rook shifted. It takes longer than usual given how worn down they are starting to feel. Jacob helps them out of the tangled blanket and Rook jumps off the bed, picks up their empty bowl in their mouth, and nods their head at the closed door.

Jacob is smart enough to get the message and opens it, “We got lots of deer meat for you, Pup.”

He follows Rook down to the kitchen and all Rook can think about is how to escape.

 

 

 

Rook notices that Jacob no longer expects them to be a cannibal.

When it’s time to feed the wolves, Jacob calls Rook away from the pile of dead bodies the Judges are feasting on and it’s just him and Rook on a small hunting trip. Occasionally Staci joins much to Rook’s pleasure as he’s still very squeamish when Rook takes down a deer by wielding a branch in their mouth and stabbing it through the deer’s ribs.

Staci couldn’t believe his eyes and Jacob proudly said, “My Pup.”

It is very annoying that Jacob has deemed that as Rook’s name. Rook has only allowed Jacob and Staci to call them Pup, anyone else Rook growls at them and they shut up.

After the reveal, Jacob brought Rook back to his side. Maybe he’s still suspicions of their loyalties and saw through Rook avoiding answers because Rook never liked saying lies. Half-truths, Rook thinks, they’re just hinting lies and truths to be more confusing and cryptic.

Jacob now talks to Rook like they’re human but like, that’s pretty normal for anyone with a pet. No one questions Herald Jacob asking Rook’s opinions on choke points for the Whitetails. Rook humors him by howling makeshift words that sound almost comprehensible. The other soldiers are starting to think that maybe the Judges are learning English.

At one point Rook went overboard with it when they caught some soldiers getting too rough with some caged resistant people. The garble of words was more of a caterwaul and less of a _“MEAT!”_ They actually got a few prisoners to laugh as Rook bit one soldier’s pants down.

There are actually a few instances where Rook tries to speak with Jacob before. He would get night terrors, not often but enough to worry them and Rook had to wrestle a sleeping Jacob to wake up. He gets more violent, still fighting the war inside his subconscious and Rook pins him to the bed and coo. Cooing works, it’s the closest thing to humming instead of trying to say ‘wake up’ with their dog vocal chords.

The next time Jacob has a nightmare Rook shifts and with hands it’s easier to pin down the man and slap his face.

Jacob doesn’t say words during his nightmares, he just screams and sobs.

_(A wolf, Rook sobs and runs)_

“Wake up Jacob. John Jacob Jingle whatever Smith, his name was my name too!” Rook sings off key, hoping that’ll wake him up as they wrestle against Jacob’s thrashing body. His eyes snap open after the third slap but there’s still blankness there. The moonlight barely reflects back in his eyes. “Come on soldier, the war’s over.”

“Miller,” Jacob chokes out, his breath labor, and he says a few other unfamiliar names.

“You did what you could to survive,” Rook said, taking Jacob’s face into their hands, getting him to keep eye contact. He stops struggling and his eyes regain focus. “Call it opportunity or desperation, whatever, you did it and you have to live with it and you can live past it.”

Jacob rambles out the names again, breathlessly and tears are falling.

“They’re gone and you’re here,” Rook said. “It sucks and you feel so alone and small but you’re still here, Jacob.”

“Why?” He cries weakly and he buries his face into Rook’s shoulders, his arms wrap around their bare waist. Carefully, Rook maneuvers their bodies to be lying side by side. The bed barely fits the both of them.

Rook waits until Jacob runs out of tears, petting his hair and tracing the battle wounds in his arms. By now Rook knows that Jacob’s wide awake after a good cry and he returns the gentleness by rubbing their cheeks together.

“Better?” Rook asked.

“Yeah,” he sighs, “Thank you.”

“No problem.”

Jacob frees an arm to get the blanket over Rook. “How are you a wolf?”

“A wolf shifter persuaded me and I saw a new life ahead of me. Also having a tail is pretty cool.”

“I like your ears best.”

“Oh god you’re a furry.”

“ _You’re_ the furry.”

This is the one argument that Rook can’t win but damn do they try. “I am validly and literally one in the magical sense and not the perverted sense.” Half. Lies. Wait, they meant half-truths. “Can we like, not.”

“Fine, Rook.”

It’s been so long since Rook cuddled with anyone. Intimacy will always be something Rook desperately craves and Jacob is just so big and warm. He’s a constant weight in Rook’s life and before it was once just labeled as a threat but now, with Jacob tearstained and soft, this is something Rook wants.

And when Rook wants something, something to fix an ache in their heart, to be bigger than the moon, it doesn’t last long.

Nothing stays constant. Everything about Rook shifts. They were human and then they were casted off. They were a wolf and then they couldn’t find a way out. Shifting between forms, finding people and leaving them, and ending up in Hope Country was the pinnacle of acceleration.

Rook doesn’t know if this bond with Jacob will kill them or not.

It gets tested on the next hunt.

Jacob’s small unit of his best men and wolves are with him. Rook takes strides with Staci, guarding him from the Judges rather than the Whitetails Jacob is tracking. It’s been the Whitetails for weeks, attacking the soldiers and stealing supplies.

They weren’t anticipating a combination attack by Nick Rye and Sharky Boshaw.

Rook is proudly happy that the resistance is teaming up with the Whitetails, something that they couldn’t get the chance to do because of the high number of Jacob’s soldiers. Thanks to a certain wolf that number has been slowly dwindling down.

Gun fire is everywhere in this thick woods and the explosions are disorienting. Everyone is spread out and fighting and taking cover. The Judges are the ones dealing the most damage and taking out Whitetails before they’re shot down. Rook decides that this is the moment and launches at an unsuspecting wolf before it tackles their own target.

The Whitetail soldier is horrified and confused all in one second and then shoots the Judge. It’s helpful and Rook gives a bark and moves onto the next Judge. The wolves all take notice of Rook’s betrayal and choose to circle them.

Honestly Rook has been waiting for this fight.

Two Judges get on Rook’s back, biting at their ears or neck. Rook slams them into a tree and bites a leg to get off. It’s been so long since Rook fought another animal. Only sharp teeth and talons can tear up eyes or faces, blinding the Judges and knocking them into jugged rocks.

Flesh and blood fly everywhere as Rook bites and flings their body at the other wolves. They’re barely aware that the humans are yelling for retreats, they don’t know which side nor do they care as they fight off the last remaining Judge.

The Judge snarls and jumps high at Rook but that’s enough for the shifter to rise on their back legs and scratch at the stomach and slam the Judge down. They roll around in the dirt, snapping their jaws at each other.

Rook ignores the blood seeping out from the scratches and bite marks. All it takes is the adrenaline rush and pureblooded want to take this wolf down. With the lack of blood and stamina screaming at them, Rook shifts one paw into a hand with talons and grapples the Judge’s throat. They puncture their claws in and feel the wolf’s breathing start to fail as blood clogs the wind pipe.

This won’t be the last time Rook watched the life die out in another creature’s eyes. That is something Rook made amendments with as they pull their hand away and let the corpse slump down.

The heat of the battle is still going on, bullets are flying and underneath all that noise the wolf shifter hears, “Rook?”

A few feet away, Staci Pratt is bloody and bruised and panicked and he’s staring at the right arm that mismatched with the wolf. Only a handful of people have gotten a close look at the bite mark and no other scar compares with it.

Rook really wishes they had a backup plan because suddenly they and Staci freeze when they hear Jacob call out his names for them. He sounds almost far away, shouting for them to retreat with them.

This is where Rook realizes that everyone is too busy shooting at each other and Jacob is prioritizing where his two pets-prisoners-whatever are. The battlefield is chaos and this is Rook’s element.

They run over to Staci and tug at his jacket, trying to lead him away from Jacob’s voice.

Staci, he, he just falls to his knees and breaks down. He grips his head, disregards the gunfire and the bloodshed but Rook sees him flinch when Jacob screams, “Peaches!”

Throughout this whole damn adventure, Rook is careful to not use the word broken to describe Staci. They just can’t think of him as that, they needed hope that Staci will one day leave this hell.

Rook catches their own twitch when Jacob shouts, “Pup!”

Air is trapped in their throat and while the rush of the fight is dying down, panic is settling in their heart. Far off they could barely see the red of Jacob’s hair but his voice is still in his head, his voice when he’s angry and sad and crying and happy.

The hitch in Staci’s breathing snaps Rook’s attention back to him. Rook’s priorities have slowly changed over the past few weeks. There was the objective of surviving and mess up Jacob as much as they can but overall, the most important one was to keep Staci safe.

Staci has his eyes wide open but he’s not truly seeing. His eyes only focus in when Rook shifts to full human form and kneels right in front of him. He doesn’t run away at least as Rook gently takes his hands in theirs.

“We gotta leave now,” Rook said, hoping that Staci regains his senses. It’s not often that they talk someone down from a maybe panic attack.

“No, it’s not possible,” he chokes out, “Jacob, he’ll tie me up again, play that video, play that _song!_ ”

Bile rises up in their chest but it’s not the time. “He hasn’t found us, we can run, Staci.” They bring him to his feet but he’s shaking, his breath quickens.

“He’ll hunt us down. I can’t,” Staci frantically shakes his head and his nails dig into Rook’s hands, “I can’t, I’m not, I’m not right or strong and _he_ knows that!”

“Jacob is only making you think the way he thinks. You are not him or anything he says about you,” Rook makes sure that Staci keeps his eyes on them. The gunfire is dying down and anyone still alive is making their way out. Jacob heading in this direction but he doesn’t notice them yet. “You’re strong Staci! You’re still alive and breathing and you’ll get out of this. Please just trust me and run!”

He squeezes their hands together and Rook takes that as an okay for them to start running towards where the Whitetails were retreating to.

“Rook!”

They shouldn’t turn their head but they do. Jacob isn’t aiming his gun at them and he’s not glaring, he’s just staring at Rook and they can’t phantom the emotion between them. Thankfully Staci makes sure Rook doesn’t falter, clutches to Rook’s arm and gets Rook to look ahead instead of looking back.

_(The wolf, bigger than the moon, ran and ran)_

 

 

 

Eli Palmer, the leader of the Whitetails, finds them first and thankfully doesn’t ask why Rook’s naked. He just gives them a large cloak for modesty’s sake as they trek over to the Whitetails’ den.

It’s a small homely bunker with a nice couch that Rook convinced Staci to take a nap on. Once fully clothed, Eli got Rook to the dented folding table with a hot meal and a radio.

“So you’re finally back, Deputy,” Dutch greets and it brings back a sense of security to hear him again.

“Hi Dutch,” Rook smiles and slurps up their meal, “I tried my best but Jacob did find me. No, he didn’t whammy me,” they quickly reassured to Eli and the other Whitetails lingering around, “but he got in Staci’s head.”

Rook looks over to the couch where Staci sleeping on his stomach. The woman, Tammy, standing by scowls while Eli squeezes his eyes and looks to Rook.

“Then what did he do to you?” Eli asked.

“Most of the time he sent men to fight me in the pin and I did what I had to do. Overall, he treated me like a dog,” they shrugged, “like his pet?”

One guy, Wheaty if they’re correct, splits out his drink, “What the hell? Is that why you were naked?”

Half-truths, everybody, they are fun.

“I’m not going to answer that,” Rook said and finishes up the food as Eli and Dutch catches them on the resistance stuff.

“Well you’ve done well on your end. There really has been smaller numbers in Seed’s hunting groups.” Eli pats Rook’s back, “Thank you Deputy.”

Here it is again, that look of hope in someone else’s eyes. There’s always that warm gratitude that reminds Rook that yeah, this is was they’ve been working for. Also that pressure of expectation is screaming too. Especially now that Rook’s aware of their bond with Jacob Seed.

It’s time to do what Rook does best and that’s run away.

Eli generously gifts them with a med kit, a radio, food, and bunch of guns. All a person needs to survive the day in Hope Country.

Rook and Staci head out the next morning and he’s staring at Rook’s arm.

“So,” Rook starts, “Remember that time you asked if I’m either a cat person or a dog person.”

Without hesitation, Staci swats at that very arm. “I can’t fucking believe you!”

“You didn’t freak out back then!”

“Rook, you piece of shit,” Staci rubs his forehead and tenses up, “I saw you eat someone.”

They lowered their head, shame and bile creeping up at the base of their throat. “Let’s not talk about that.”

“You became Jacob’s Judge.”

“They never accepted me into their pack,” Rook hissed, “Trust me on that.”

“But you stayed by his side,” Staci said, “just like me.”

“I know,” they groaned, “I got caught and then he became a constant presence and I had no idea on how to make him not.”

Staci suddenly grabbed Rook’s shoulders and looked at them straight in the eyes, “Rook, are you sure you didn’t watch the videos?” They nod their head. “Alright but what did he do to you? And don’t be vague. You already piss off Joey enough with that.”

Rook isn’t one to gauge how strong a friendship is because of their record of running away. But they trust Staci and they want Staci to trust them and this requires truth.

As they hike back to the Henbane River, Rook talks about the Jacob they learned about. He was an intelligent and witty fighter, remorseful and grieving over the people he lost in the war, how he was gentle to his wolves and how all of this is inexcusable to the blood path he made with his family.

“He killed so much that he’s numb or at least he bottles it up and I see it all come crashing down on him,” Rook said. “His ideology is bullshit and I want to throttle his neck to change his mind.”

“But you don’t want to kill him,” Staci said, “I don’t get it. I don’t want to kill him because I’m terrified of seeing him again but you want to change him. That’s not an easy solution.”

“I know, the easy way out is to just kill him,” they rub absent mindedly at their bite mark. “The moment when I face him down, and it will happen, I don’t think I do it.”

“Not because of fear,” Staci probed, “or anger or for moral code.”

Because, Rook thinks, there’s this bond that Rook cannot deny but they can’t decipher what it means truly and they don’t want to. Besides, the raw answer is some unhealthy codependency which is something that Rook has no idea on how to deal with.

“None of those things,” Rook nods.

“Rook, whatever happens,” Staci looks away, “if you spare him or something, I won’t hate you.” Up ahead is the prison where Whitehorse and the other resistance members take refuge in, the scouts already spotted them and wave them over. “But other people will.”

They sighed, “I’ve been hated for many things but this? This is pretty new on that long list.”

Regrouping with Whitehorse ended with surprisingly a big hug from the man. He’s looks more tired since the last time Rook was here but they never saw the sheriff this happy. It doesn’t last long as they talk about work and what needs to be done.

Since Rook was gone, a few outposts got taken by the Seeds along with Fall’s End. That’s pretty much all it took for Rook to stand up and start marching to the Holland Valley.

Staci decided to stay with Whitehorse and get check up by Doctor Charles. Before Rook took off, he returned the gauze back to Rook’s arm.

“What does bigger than the moon even mean?” Staci asked, carefully wrapping it around and around, making sure the faded words are at least seen.

“It’s from this old story I can’t remember well,” Rook said, “I think it was about a sad kid wishing at the moon and realizing it’s the eye of a big wolf.”

“Well, it’s your story now, Rook.”

They give Staci one last hug and decided, yeah hugs are nice.

On the way to Fall’s End, Rook got caught up with Grace Armstrong and learned how John Seed hasn’t been happy with the deputy’s absence. Now that Rook’s back, he got instantly alerted and reclaimed territory and went back to mocking Rook on the radio.

Rook totally ignored that channel but ended up with Kim Rye stressing out over the wires. Nick got ambushed on the return flight, he’s caught along with Mary May and Pastor Jerome.

It all came crashing down at the church because Rook gets instantly knocked out at the doors and wakes up to see John arguing with Jacob.

Why, just why?

The brothers are at the stage of the church, making hush yells and finger jabs at each other. Everywhere else has John’s men standing guard around the captives. Thankfully they’re all sitting together in the front pew.

Nick is cursing under his breath, bitching about the new tattoo on his bare chest. Mary May’s glaring at the Seeds but is nudging Rook awake by elbowing them. Pastor Jerome actually greets them with a hello but he’s anxious and hurt from the looks of it. Grace on the other hand is looking around, calculating something and trying to keep her cool.

Rook forces the ache in their head to stop and concentrate on what the Seeds are doing.

They met Jacob’s eyes and there’s a hitch in their breathing.

“Good, you’re finally up,” John, the attention seeking whore that he is, stands center of the stage with his arms spread wide and his tattoo gun in hand. “I missed you Deputy.”

“Jacob,” they tried to ignore all the eyes on them, “what are you doing here?”

For the big and tall man that he is, Jacob scratches his neck and tilts his head down, “Well I’m stopping a bad tattoo job for you.”

“What?”

“Oh come on!” Nick yells, failing an arm out, nearly hitting the guard next to him. He ignores the gun aimed at him and continues, “You could’ve come in earlier and struck this deal for me!”

“I doubt it,” Grace said.

John stomps with his probably expensive boot, “All of you shut up!”

Grace injects a quick, “Fuck you.”

“Deputy,” he walks in front of them, tutting disapprovingly, “My dear brother would never let me cleanse his sins but now he changes his mind all so I won’t make you confess.” He crouches down to have them at eye level, “I almost want to thank you for,” he tilts his head from side to side as he decides the word, “ _motivating_ Jacob to have confession.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Rook said and regrets it, “Oh um, sorry Pastor.”

“It’s fine Rook,” Pastor Jerome assured, his face quirking up in a small smile at Rook breaking the tension.

John goes back over to Jacob, “I’m not too keen on this arrangement but if it means you’re finally confessing your sins then I’m happy.” He checks his tattoo gun and makes a gimme gesture to Jacob, “Are you ready?”

_(The maw of the wolf inched closer to Rook)_

Jacob stares at Rook when he said, “Yes.”

_(Rook took a breath and presented their arm)_

He presents his right arm to his brother.

“And what’s your sin, Jacob?” John asks giddily with a tight grip on Jacob’s arm and the needle ready.

Jacob turns away from Rook’s gaze and down to his arm, “Envy.”

“Interesting,” John said as begins his work. The buzz of the gun fills up the silence.

Rook watches in mild disgust and confusion. They know for damn sure that John absolutely wanted to tattoo wrath on them but apparently Jacob was higher on that list. Maybe Rook will never understand brotherhood, or at least these brothers.

There’s also the inquiry of Jacob’s envy. Rook knows envy, wanting something that didn’t belong to them like a better life, stability, or even cookies. Out of all the sins, Jacob chose envy. Rook’s not sure what this means.

Meanwhile, Mary May leans over to Rook and doesn’t bother to whisper at all. “Did you get in Jacob’s pants?”

“No just his bed.”

From Jacob’s wince, John dug the needle a little too deep. “I can add lust to your skin, if you’re confessing more.”

Jacob smirks at his little brother, “You know I don’t kiss and tell.”

“We didn’t kiss!”

“We did cuddle,” Jacob said, winking at Rook.

They open their mouth a few times to try to speak words. Eventually Rook sighs, “Yeah, I’ll admit to that, yes.”

This time John glares at Rook, finishing off the tattoo.

“Fuck Rook,” Nick said and turns to them, “Okay as a husband and as a soon to be dad, know that I’m right when I say that you got it bad.”

To say that the next few minutes were the most awkward minutes in Rook’s life didn’t give the uncomfortable glances exchanged enough credit. Jacob’s and John’s deal had the peggies leave Fall’s End but Rook heard something on their way out.

The peggies aimed their guns at the resistance as they made their way to their getaway cars, or for John’s case, a helicopter.

John tapped a finger to Rook’s chest and whispered, “One day, Wrath.”

“Your nicknaming sucks.”

“I agree, Pup.” Jacob had to stand in John’s bubble to make John stomp off.

“Jacob you,” Rook looked to at the crude _ENVY_ , “you would never do this.”

Rook held their breath as Jacob gently traced a finger on their ear, tapping once. “You’re my pup.”

He walked to John and the readied helicopter and Jacob still kept their gaze. Rook narrowed their eyes and took a guess.

With the rest of the peggies cleared out and their friends at their side, Rook casually laced their fingers together behind their head. Their arms hid their ears well enough and no one but Jacob was paying attention to Rook’s shifting ears.

Jacob finally broke their stare and turned to John. Far away and with the roar of the helicopter, it was a bit of a strain to hear Jacob say, “I think Joseph and Faith would like to see my confession. It’s been a while since a family dinner hasn’t it?”

Rook quickly shifted their ears back and let their arms drop.

If John’s out of the bunker, he’s not torturing Joey Hudson and he’ll take soldiers with him. His personal army would be divided and from the many attempts of Rook trying to face them all off at the bunker doors, this is the best chance Rook will get.

They waste no time, ignoring anyone calling their name to gear up. Nick tracks the helicopter for them, confirming that it’s heading towards the compound with half the cars following and the other half going to John’s bunker.

Shit, Rook won’t beat them there.

Unless.

_(Young Rook ran and cried, once more alone in the cold night)_

They had to move fast and leave their confused allies behind. Once out of view, Rook shifted and ran. Their skin tingles and buzzes as their body morphs. Their heartbeat pulses to the rhythm of the ache in muscles, reshaping with the bones.

At the bunker, John’s men are frantic to report that a wolf suddenly appeared at the entrance and took down all the front guards.

Rook chomps at the radio of the last downed guard and proceeds into the bunker. The last time they were here was not pleasant but it’s easier to track Joey’s scent.

Taking down the guards is easy. Maybe Rook’s getting too numb to react to killing but they can think about it later. Joey’s at the very end of this hole, John’s private workshop no less. It’s very creepy and eerily quiet.

And then she tackles them.

Joey is ballistic as much Staci is paranoid. She’s trying to pin down a wolf for Christ’s sake and stab them with a knife!

All Rook wants to do is help them. They don’t want these people to be lonely or abandoned.

They shift right in front of her, holding her wrists, “Joey, it’s me. This is really me.”

“What the hell?” She pants out and oh no, she’s breathing too fast and pushing Rook away. “No, no, this is just another trick.” Joey falls on her butt and breathes too harshly.

“Joey, this looks crazy but it’s true.” Rook’s beginning to panic a little and involuntary shifts their ears to be wolfish. “Oh god, this is so much more stressful than when I told Staci.”

There’s a sharp intake of breath and for a moment Rook doesn’t know what that means and fears the worst. But then Joey stands up and gets in Rook’s face. She glares at them. “You told Staci this before _me?_ ”

“Um,” Rook nervously drawls a little too long, long enough for their tail to come out and swish anxiously. “We are wasting time! Let’s get out of here!”

Before Rook could run Joey grabs their shoulder and pulls them in for a crushing hug. “It’s really you. No one is this awkward. No drug or hallucination would ever have me fantasize you naked with wolf parts.”

“I’ll return the hug when I’m clothed. Now let’s go.” Rook shifts back into a full wolf much to Joey’s horrified awe. With Joey’s help they’re able to free some civilians on the way out.

It’s all a satisfying rush as Joey grabs a gun and fires as Rook bites at any peggie in sight. Outside, Joey hotwires a stray car and they ride off to Fall’s End.

“You are going to give me the full story, Rook,” she demands, flicking their nose.

Rook howls as loud and as annoying as possible. They got Staci and Joey back. They don’t feel small.


	4. a new life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is all because i was/am really thirsty for jacob

_To be bigger than the moon is ambitious, said the wolf._

_Young Rook huffed at them._

_I want to be big, said Rook_

_You said I will be big, said Rook._

_To be bigger than the moon, I will be, said Rook._

_I have no doubts about that, chuckled the wolf._

_Two wolves in the city of lies, they are truths casted in shadows._

_They hunt and they kill and they run and run._

_The city feared them._

_For who would stop a wolf?_

_The city ignored them._

_For who would believe in a wolf?_

_The city treated them like any other scum of the street._

_For who would see a lesser being as human?_

_Young Rook wished to lie that life was better._

_But young Rook is not a liar._

_Rook the wolf is still the runaway, the abandoned, and the thief._

_They are not the story of liar. They tell only truth but holds secrets._

_It is balance in their chaos._

_To know when to be human and to know when to be not, said the wolf._

_You will be wiser than me, is the promise._

_To know when to kill and to know when to spare, said the wolf._

_You will be braver than me, is the promise._

_To know your own self, said the wolf._

_You will be bigger than me, is the promise._

_Rook has learned and cared and cried for this wolf._

_Why, asked Rook, I will be all these things but why?_

_The wolf, the one renamed as Pluto, stayed still._

_The lights of the city cast the shadow of the wolf._

_We are rare because we are secrets or we are ignored, said Pluto._

_We are beasts of many, marginalized or dehumanized by dominate narrative, said Pluto._

_We are not the city, said Pluto._

_No, Rook angered, but we are a part of it._

_Are wolves to be executioners for the city?_

_Are wolves to be chasers after criers?_

_Are wolves to be consequences of lies?_

_Pluto remained still._

_I will be bigger, Rook promised, but I cannot grow here._

_Then you will leave, Pluto promised, but not as a wolf._

_There is sadness and relief in their eyes._

_Rook askes, why did you chase me?_

_To prevent lies from plaguing another thief is the answer._

_Rook askes, why did you bite me?_

_To share an impossible truth to another abandoned is the answer._

_Rook askes, why are you letting me go?_

_To let the runaway get away for good is the answer._

_For who would stop a city?_

_Rook stared at the wolf, too large for the city, bigger than the moon._

_I must stay, said the wolf, to fight the city._

_This odyssey, as whimsical and as phantasmal as it starts, ends the same way._

_The wolf caught up to Rook._

_The wolf made a promised to Rook._

_The wolf will get Rook to leave the city._

_No one but a wolf came to help after all._

 

 

 

“I only known Pluto as a wolf but they acted more human than anyone else in the city,” Rook thought back to those early days. “It could’ve been a giant metaphor or symbolism, they were always into that.”

It was early morning but that didn’t stop Joey Hudson from drinking. Getting her back was a reason to celebrate and they roped Staci with them to the Spread Eagle. The three deputies were back together.

They were sitting in a secluded corner of the bar where Rook explained why they never regretted leaving the city.

Joey critiqued, “Why did you put so much trust in this wolf?”

“At first I thought none of it was real, that I might as well follow this crazy dream as long as it goes. But I saw how Pluto would protect the people on the streets. We divided attackers and victims, spooked off people about to commit a crime, and yeah the police would be after us a few times.”

Staci leaned over to Joey, “Is this giving you some Venom vibes?”

“No,” she shoved him away, “I mean it’s not like Rook ever ate a person.” Rook bit their lip shut and Staci slurped up his beer quickly. “Well shit.”

“It was under dire circumstances,” Rook squeaked and sighed dramatically, “I can’t really defend myself here.”

“They were already dead,” Staci supplied, equally disturbed and uncomfortable.

Joey switched her gaze from one deputy to the other, “Oh this happened recently I see.”

“I never wanted to cross that line,” Rook quickly drank up their water when they felt bile rising up. “Yes, I did follow Pluto fatefully throughout the city, killed people too but only when it was necessary. Pluto became my family, helped me out as a kid and taught me leaving the city doesn’t mean running away from something I can’t fight. That leaving was fighting the city.”

“Okay that’s nice and all,” Joey said, “but you never figured out who they were, like as a human. You got anonymous help into a scholarship program, legal documents with your name on it despite you never having a legal guardian.”

Rook shrugged, “I knew it was all them, and if that’s how they can help I wasn’t going to say no.”

Suddenly Staci slammed his drink on the table, “Wait a fucking minute, you renounce everything from your old life.”

“Yep,” they nodded.

“And then this Pluto helps you out with the legal paper work to be in the system, like putting everything under your new name.”

Seeing where this is going, Rook grins, “Yep.”

“And your name, the one that you picked out for yourself,” Staci, suppressing a rage that Rook has never seen before, glares at them, “is Rook _Wolfe_.”

“It just,” Rook smiled innocently, laughing, “I couldn’t think of a better name. It just felt right, you know?”

He just shook his head disapprovingly at the pun that was always hidden in Rook’s last name.

Joey pinched the bridge of her nose, “Let’s move on.”

“Yeah, we kind of skimmed over the part on how this is even possible,” hissed Staci.

“Some tales hold truth,” Rook said. “They had to come from somewhere.”

“Biologically speaking, I mean. You reform your body, bones and all, at will.”

“Or through your emotions,” Joey added.

Rook scratched at their neck, “Look, I haven’t shifted since I left the city. I’m relearning my control or something but I was never perfect from the start.” An emotional outburst would be intense enough to have Rook shifted but not fully. Overall they like to think they managed to cover up any slips.

“If I never saw your naked ass, I wouldn’t believe this,” she said, “and then your ears changed and I thought I was going crazy.”

“Wait mean like,” Staci raised his hands over to his ears and folds his fingers a few times to emphasize a point. Rook plopped their forehead to the table, hoping that Mary May isn’t listening in. They looked over to her and saw the bartender whistling casually to the radio.

“Only the ears,” Joey gossiped, “I bet they do the same with the tail.”

“Stop,” Rook whined, “can we talk about something else?”

Joey poked the top of their head and pushed Rook’s face up, “I heard that Jacob Seed got a tattoo.”

Staci stood up, empty glass in hand, “Mary May, do you have anything stronger?”

Once he moved over to the bar stools, Rook sat up proper and said, “You’re mean.”

“I’m also pissed because from the sounds of it, he’s obsessed with you on a new level and you spent so much time as his pet.” She reached over the able to grab Rook’s hands, “Say it with me, this is fucked up.”

“This is fucked up.”

The repeat it a few times as Staci returned with three shot glasses.

“Yay, the return of the ‘fucked up’ chant,” he handed the shots to his fellow deputies, “I got your favorite, Rook.”

“Staci, you’re the best,” Rook raised their glass in respect. At Joey’s glare, they said, “Joey, you’re the better.”

Before they could clink glasses, Rook’s radio acted up until Kim Rye’s frantic voice called out for assistance for a special deliver.

Rook placed their shot down, “I have done many crimes and I’m proud to say that drinking and driving is not one of them.”

Their friends wished Rook good luck as they made their way to the Ryes.

Oh boy, this car ride deserves a chant of _this is fucked up._

John Seed must be bitter or planned this along as his personal army is chasing after them with cars, trucks, and a falling plane. The gun fire isn’t as loud as a pregnant woman’s screams though.

Rook is stomping down the claws of anxiety and panic to focus on driving the damn car to the clinic. If they spare one more thought on stress, they might accidently shift something, it’s a habit of theirs that they never really grew out of.

But now’s not the time to think about that as Rook swerves the car pass a barricade and Nick returns fire to the bullets pelting them.

 _“Fuck all of THEM!”_ Kim roars and takes the shotgun out of Nick’s hands and shoots at the approaching car driving by.

“Rook, for the love of God, speed up!” Nick pleaded.

“I am!”

Kim screams more but this time she points at the second falling plane aimed for them. A hard turn slams everyone to one side of the car as Rook drives through a rough trail. There’s a jump coming up and at speed they’re going, the landing won’t be nice.

As it turns out, Rook is right because they landed on rocky ground and Rook is trying their best to angle the car for a safe fall.

It was safe enough that the three of them weren’t too hurt. The car took all the damage as they’re slammed into trees aligned with another road. The engine is out and collectively they all curse. Nick helps Kim out lie down on the backseat while Rook radio’s in their position and how the peggies haven’t found them yet.

Going on foot is out of the question and the other option is to wait for the peggies to come along firing in and try to take their car.

A third option is apparently the way things are going as Kim crushes her husband’s hand.

“Oh god, she wants to come out now!”

Nick and Kim are too busy sharing horrified looks to each other to notice Rook’s tail brushing out of their pants. Rook doesn’t notice either as they’re screaming into their hands.

“Someone experienced with delivering a baby, please talk us through it,” Rook cries into the radio channel. “We’re not making it to the clinic. It’s gonna be a backseat baby!”

In the midst of all their screaming, the sound of a car is coming up the road. Rook wants to cry in relief until they see the driver come out.

“Take one step closer to my family,” Nick warns, cocking the shotgun and putting himself in front of Jacob Seed, “and I’ll blow your brains out.”

“My little brother has your channels hacked,” Jacob said, raising his hands up in surrender, “I convinced him to let you go.”

“Before or after the second plane tried to crash into us?” Kim hissed and waved over to Rook to squeeze their hand. They complied and the intense pain brings Rook to their knees and become smart enough to shift their tail away.

Jacob turned to Nick, “You complained before about not making a deal for you. How else do you think y’all have not gotten jumped yet?”

_(There is sadness and relief in their eyes)_

Kim grits her teeth and Rook helps her out of the car, “Alright, we get it, I kindly ask you to fuck off.”

Once they got her into the backseat of the working car, Rook rushed over to the wheel and Nick finally stopped aiming the gun at Jacob and joined Kim. Jacob becomes small in the rearview mirror as Rook slams it on the gas.

“When I said that you two got it bad,” Nick said, wincing as Kim grips his hand, “I honestly didn’t think it’ll go this far.”

“Let’s just focus on Carmina’s birthday,” Rook said, finally seeing the clinic in sight.

 

 

 

Rook doesn’t notice anything unusual for the next few weeks. They just focus on taking down outposts and rescuing civilians, going from John’s region and back into Faith’s. Being smarter, Rook does shift whenever the moment calls for it and they and Boomer become a dangerous duo.

Everything is going good so that only means something bad is going to happen.

Actually Rook doesn’t know if the news from Dutch is good or bad.

He reports that there’s a lot of inaction from Jacob Seed. His men left outposts and most stopped hunting down people there or are following another herald. The veterans’ center is still peggie territory but other than that the rest of the mountain is free.

The fact that there’s no activity from him is the worrying part. When Rook and the Ryes told their friends what happened everyone, to mildly put it, flipped.

Whatever Jacob is doing must be a part of a scheme to hurt everyone later and Rook couldn’t disagree with them. No one, Rook included, even considers if he’s switching sides. It’s just not possible.

He wouldn’t change his mind because of Rook would he?

_(To be bigger than the moon is ambitious, said the wolf)_

Their friends are convinced that Rook probably did something to Jacob but Rook always leaves the room before Joey or Pratt could urge them to talk more about their time as his Judge.

Rook will always be a runaway at heart.

Thankfully no one chases after them since only Rook is crazy enough to traverse through the Henbane River region with the risk of a blissed high. Actually they haven’t tried smoking the flowers yet, it’s on a list of stupid ideas that should never happen.

But that doesn’t stop Faith from sending bliss their way.

The sparkles fade in from the edges of their mind, fuzzing up their senses until white takes up the world. Rook blinks and sees the flower field and thinks, fuck not again.

She always tries to walk Rook onto memory lane, more into her memories to try to twist it into Rook’s. It’s too familiar, the loneliness and despair and being lost. But the moment the path turns into the city, Rook would let go of her hand and refuse to take a step further.

So far she hasn’t forced them to walk but it scares Rook to know that one day she can easily make them remember everything that happened in that damn city.

_(No, Rook angered, but we are a part of it)_

Rook doesn’t believe that Faith knows about the wolf shifting, so far they were able to suppress any thought. The closest call would be the streets where Pluto chased them.

Today is just the flowers of Hope Country. This is something that Rook can handle.

And then Jacob Seed appears out of the sparkle fog. Yeah, Rook can’t handle this.

“Okay Faith!” Rook yells, waving their arms, “This is low, even for you!”

Jacob clenches his fist, awkwardly shifts his weight on his feet, “Deputy.”

Rook blows a raspberry and starts to poke at him, “Real convincing. Not! The Jacob inside my head would never call me deputy.”

“Would you,” he smacked away Rook’s hands as they continue to poke at his face, “Rook, stop. Would you want her to dig into your head and know each and every moment you spent with me?”

They freeze up.

Their face heats up as they remember exactly what they did in Jacob’s bed.

“Blushing’s not the reaction I expected,” Jacob said, confused and not understanding why Rook is wide eyed and harshly rubbing their cheeks.

“I hate you.”

“This yeah,” he clicks his tongue, “I expected this.”

“You and your family hurt my friends, the only people who are close to me!” Rook claws at their head, digging the blunt nails in to feel pain and not the soothing numbness of the bliss. “And now I have more people here that are important to me and I don’t want to lose them. I fought so hard to get here, to get away from the city.”

“Rook, you need to calm down,” Jacob steady said, gently removing their hands.

They’re tempted to just stab their talons into their palms. It’s a trick they learned early, sharp pain to counter the bliss. But Jacob is holding their hands and the bliss is like the fuzziest blanket they ever felt.

“Why?” Rook quietly utters, “I don’t deserve anyone, why are there good people in my life?”

“Because they care about you, you’re worth it all.”

“But I’m a thief and abandoned,” they breathe out the words easily, inhaling the bliss, “I keep running away from everyone. I left people like me, I left the person who got me out of the city, and I don’t know where I’m running to.”

It’s weird to see Jacob sad in the daytime, the light and whiteness highlights his scarred face. His hair looks less like fire and more like fall leaves. Rook reaches over to brush his hair. It’s not as soft as they wished it to be. Usually everyone in the bliss is squeaky clean.

Jacob takes their hand off, steps in closer until their noses are bumping. He gently checks Rook’s eyes, pushing up the eyelids and Rook attempts to copy but Jacob keeps smacking their hands away.

“Faith, you don’t usual work like this,” he said, still checking Rook’s pupils.

“That’s not my nickname,” Rook whines.

“Not you,” he chides and suddenly the lady in white walks in like she always does. She gets Jacob’s warm hands off of Rook, pulls him off more like it, and clings to his arm like a lovingly little sister. “What are you doing?”

Faith swings her hips, swishing her skirt against the tall grass. She smiles at Jacob as she boops Rook’s nose, “I’m just preparing the Deputy for our family. You heard them. They don’t know where to run to.” She moves over to hold both of Rook’s hands, “I don’t blame you either, Deputy, I mean, just look at what you ran away from!”

She says it all cheerfully as grey figures start walking out of the white light. Rook can’t make out any other detail of these figures other than their eyes.

Pairs of eyes filled with malice, despair, and judgement.

_(The city of lies, an old tale it but holds truth)_

The figures circle around them, glaring and crying.

“The city is really big Deputy,” Faith squeezes their hands. “So many people just like us, suffering and neglected.” She points over to a crying figure, “They’re crying because of you, right? Why did you run away from this one?”

Rook watches the figure gain details. Scraggy hair, a malnourished body, and bloodshot eyes filled with tears.

“I stole the drugs,” Rook recalled, blinking furiously, “I couldn’t change anyone’s mind. It was the only way.” Other grey figures joined the crier, gaining similar details. They are still glaring and crying at Rook.

“If we met like that,” Faith said, “I would hate you too.”

_(The children of runaways and the abandoned)_

_(Nobody came to help)_

“I wanted to help them,” Rook said, “I tried so many times.”

Eyes stared back at Rook and each one of them lost light in their eyes.

Rook couldn’t rush over to them as a few of them pulled out a gun and shot each other or another pair just started punching each other out. Majority of them just closed their eyes and fell. Faith held Rook back as each body turned to dust as they crash onto the flower bed.

“They didn’t accept your help so you left them to die,” Faith tightened her hold on Rook’s hands. “You’re not a hero Deputy, you can’t save anyone.”

_(Rook, smaller than the world, ran and ran)_

_(Nobody came to help)_

“You’re the one who needs saving. Joseph will save you and everyone else. We can be your family Rook,” Faith cups their face, brushing her thumbs in tiny circles. “After all, they don’t want you back.”

Two grey figures are in Rook’s periphery vision. Rook wants to squeeze their eyes shut but Faith is starting at them intensely, daring them to disobey her.

The figure on the left side has a high shrill of a voice. “What am I supposed to do with you? I can’t let anyone know you’re like this!”

The figure on the right side has a booming and commanding voice. “Everything would be easier if you do as you’re told. This nonsense of yours is all lies.”

_(But young Rook is not a liar)_

_(Nobody came to help)_

“I don’t deserve anyone,” Rook repeats, “I ruin their lives.”

“That’s true, you do ruin lives and you do not deserve anyone,” Faith said sweetly, smiling. “The Father will accept you though. He’ll save you. But first I think you need to remember every reason why people hate you.”

She starts to lead them in a direction and Rook willingly follows as the path fades into a familiar nightlife cityscape. But then someone grabs Rook’s right arm, stopping them from crossing the line between flowers and concrete.

“This isn’t a good idea Faith,” Jacob said, holding Rook back until Faith let go.

“Jacob, I know the bliss better than anyone,” she said proudly. “If making people happy turns them into angels, Rook should go through despair only for Joseph to pull them into the light! Just imagine it, Jacob. Rook will be a part of our family at last.”

He does stare at Rook, maybe trying to actually picture it. Rook can’t, unable to even imagine the possibility of being in a family.

For who would have a heart for them?

No one, Rook knows this. Every good person in their life, Joey, Staci, Whitehorse, they got tortured because Rook ran away when they got captured.

Now Jacob has a grumpy frown at the idea of Rook joining his family.

“It’s okay Jacob,” Rook pats the hand still clenching their arm, “I get it, I don’t deserve to be in your family.”

Whenever this sentence runs through their head, Rook always feels small. They’re guilty of running away from good people because Rook will just make things worse. They’re guilty of thieving from everyone because Rook only knows how to take and never to give. They’re guilty of being abandoned because Rook is simply Rook.

Jacob’s frown shifts into one of pure pity. It must be pity, right? It doesn’t matter since Jacob pursues his lips, “I think all it’ll take is for Rook to see one last family member.”

“Really, now, who can that be?” Faith asks.

“Just let Rook lead the way.”

Rook, dazed and confused, stares at the city that’s ready to consume them. One last family member, Rook thinks as their heart begins to ache. They know where to go.

With the Seed siblings on either side of them, Jacob still holding their arm, Rook steps onto the sidewalk and the glowing fields of Hope Country fades into the evening shine of the city of lies.

Grey figures crowd the street, the smell of alcohol and pollution fill the air, and most importantly there is a shadow of a wolf casted on them.

_(The wolf caught up to Rook)_

“Is that,” Faith had to snap her head to them and to the animal, “really, is that a wolf?”

_(The wolf made a promise to Rook)_

Jacob whispers into their ear, “You told me you saw a new life ahead of you. Well, Pup, you gotta get out of here first.”

_(The wolf will get Rook to leave the city)_

Faster than the light, darker than the night, and bigger than the moon, the wolf ran and ran and bared vicious fangs. They were ready to pounce at Faith but she screamed, flailed her arms out and disappeared in cloud of bliss before the wolf landed on her.

That same bliss fogged out the city and returned it to the flower fields.

No one but Pluto would come to help.

No one but Rook would cry for this wolf.

Rook falls to their knees as Pluto, real or not, trots over to nuzzle into their tearstained face.

“I miss you so much,” Rook sobs, clutching at their fur, “I thought I knew what I was doing, after leaving the city but I don’t! I want to help these people but I’m not enough, I’m just going to make things worse.”

Pluto coos softly.

“This isn’t real, I should know this by now,” Rook mumbles and looks up to see Jacob, “I forgot you’re still here.”

“I knew you like cuddles.”

“Pluto’s my emotional support wolf,” they said like that’ll make any sense as they hug Pluto tighter. “Faith will come back won’t she?”

“Yes but I’m surprised you haven’t found a way out yet.” At Rook’s thinking face he clarifies, “The bliss doesn’t work the same way for animals. She can’t get into their heads, only knocks them out.”

Ah, they never thought of that.

Rook buries their face into Pluto’s fur one last time, “I’ll see you again, some day.”

Shifting in the bliss doesn’t feel painful at all. It’s just another easy fall into sleep.

 

 

 

They wake up in a cot of a prison cell with a blanket pulled over their naked human body.

Staci is bouncing a rubber ball and fumbles when Rook rolls off the bed.

“Um, hey Rook, you’re up. Or down really. There are clothes in that box there.” Rook groans as they get changed. “Also Joey’s setting up an intervention for you.”

Rook groans more, tugging on their uniform. Fully dressed, they still search through the box, “Where’s my gauze?”

He tosses the ball up and down, thinking out loud, “I don’t know. Probably the last place you were human.”

Gee that narrows down the location, sure. But then Rook recalls the bliss thing. “And how did I get here?”

“That’s exactly what the intervention is for,” Staci said, pushing Rook to the meeting room.

Realistically, an intervention would be chairs in a circle with an easy atmosphere. But Joey Hudson is in charged so she slams her hands onto Rook’s shoulders and makes them sit on the only folding chair while everyone else is standing up, judgmentally.

It’s actually just the locals of the prison along with the second family that teams up with Rook.

“We’re here because we love you,” Joey pats their head, “and we’re worried about you.”

“Cool, um, thanks,” Rook said as politely as they could, totally unprepared for this level of care. “Look, Faith emotionally drained me on my deepest insecurities about my relationships. Hearing you love me is like whiplash.”

Like an old friend, awkward silence is here.

Sharky breaks it. “So what I’m hearing is we’re blowing up her shit later.”

Rook nods enthusiastically and Hurk Drubman Jr gives a thumbs up.

Earl Whitehorse pulls a chair over and gets to Rook’s eye level. “Rook, long term warfare was not really in this job description but you’ve handled this all like a real hero. No one expects anyone to come out stable but right now we need to make sure that none of us has reached the point of no return.”

“I’ve seen multiple points of no return,” Rook said, remembering the figures in the bliss. “I promise I’m not there.” The word _yet_ lingers in the foggiest part of their mind.

“That’s great,” Hurk smiles so genuinely that it unknots a few of Rook’s self-doubts, clearing the fog.

“Now we just gotta check on what’s going on between you and Jacob Seed,” said Tracy Leder.

“He did something to you but he didn’t,” Whitehorse glanced over to Staci, “you know, didn’t do _that_.”

Under his breath, Staci muttered, “That’s a nice way to sum up my trauma.”

“All you said is that he treated you like his pet,” said Whitehorse said, “but now that you’re here, he’s been the lost puppy.”

“He also got a new tattoo,” Joey added. She traced the inner side of her right arm, “Pride.”

“Wait so that thing with the Ryes’ kid and Jacob talking about a deal,” Sharky said and shook his head in disbelief. “He actually went through another John Seed Special?”

“He’s doing this for me,” Rook said regrettably. Something like guilt made them scratch at their bite mark. “I hope this isn’t reverse psychology or something.”

“No, don’t feel responsible! If he’s being stupid, let him be stupid!”

“Sharky, no,” Hurk said. “Jacob must be doing this to like, trip us up somehow.”

“Or,” Joey plops her hand on top of Rook’s head, “this is the weirdest form of flirting ever.”

The residents of Hope Country share a look. Adalaide smiles and corrects her, “Honey, if you think that’s the weirdest then you haven’t seen Joseph Seed shirtless in the bliss.”

Rook nods, “She’s right, Joey. If anything, whatever Jacob’s doing is the tamest.”

“I’m telling yah Rook, they all want to fuck you.”

“Thank you Sharky for the ego boost,” Rook said dryly.

“Well Rookie,” Joey growls as she drums her fingers on their forehead, “Do you want to fuck them?”

“Sometimes, it’s hard not to fuck with crazy.”

“That wasn’t a real denial!” Joey yelled, gently boking her fist on Rook’s head with each word. “You do this all the time! Please say yes or no!”

Staci pushed her hand off, “Knock it off, both of you. Rook, please for once, tell a straight answer.”

“You know I hate it when my name and the word straight are in the same sentence.”

“Avoiding answers yet again!” Joey accused.

“It’s how I was raised, alright, or at least encouraged!”

This is a normal routine for Rook and Joey. Anytime their yelling escalates, flailing their hands as each other is the least destructive way to hit.

Only Sheriff Whitehorse or Staci can stop them. All it takes is him whacking them both in the back of their heads.

As for Sharky’s and Hurk’s cheers for Rook, Adalaide glared at them to stop.

“And you guys are the leading force of the resistance,” Tracy said. Rook couldn’t tell if she was accepting what she just saw or pretending it never happened.

“The tide is turning,” Staci said. “With Jacob’s army dispersed, we got the mountains and so far that bastard hasn’t done much harm lately.”

The intervention lulls into a war meeting because while the resistance has one region, the other two are still going strong. Joey still sends Rook a pointed look whenever Jacob Seed is mentioned but it’s evident that he’s no longer a main priority.

Rook tries to not think about him too much. From the wise words of Sharky, he’s not Rook’s responsibility so they busy their selves with resistance duties. It’s fairly routine by now, selfishly unsatisfying in forethought as Rook demolishing another base.

It’s not that Rook’s bored. It’s more like they’re exhausted from the panic of losing. Or worse, panicking on how this war will end. Rook always runs away before the climax, runs away from all the yelling and the rising tension. They never liked confrontation because if Rook stays, they always get the hits they deserve.

Running away isn’t an option here, Rook reminds their self.

In the city of lies, Rook’s help was clumsy and impulsive. Things got better with Pluto’s guidance but only through violent tactics. Anything that requires conversation was never Rook’s strong suit. They just couldn’t get the right words and fell back on it and ran away.

But Rook is older now, is able to trust people a little bit more and now they forged strong bonds. Rook doesn’t want to lose them. Yes Rook is fighting for justice and survival and for maybe, questionable, the law but the need to keep these people safe is the top reason.

Also Rook doesn’t want to be alone.

It’s a simple desire, a want that reaches from the depth of their soul. They don’t want to feel small.

_(To be bigger than the moon, I will be, said Rook)_

With so many new people caring about Rook, it’s overwhelming. In a good way of course but Rook fears the worst. Maybe they’re fighting just to please their new friends. That shouldn’t be a possibility but insecurity can just be like that.

The easy way to clear their mind from all this shit is to hug Boomer.

When the moon shines bright in the darkness, Rook huddles up with the dog in the woods outskirt of the prison. They cleared out enough of Faith’s bases to finally have clean air around the resistance. Quiet moments alone and just stargazing or sitting underneath a big tree with Boomer on their lap is all it takes to ease Rook to relax.

The chill of the night keeps Rook from nodding off but Boomer is snoring peacefully. By definition, Rook is a monster but is not a dick to wake Boomer up. Besides, they were used to the cold nights of the city. Only luck gave them a good enough shelter.

So far it’s quiet with the resistance’s success and Rook will enjoy this tranquility while it lasts.

That’s when their radio’s static acts up and someone calls out, “Pup?”

Rook inhales too sharply and coughs hard, jerking Boomer awake. They frantically pet him back and grab the radio to their face. Should they answer it?

“You don’t,” Jacob hesitantly beings, “have to talk to me. This is just another private channel so don’t fret about people talking about us.” There’s another pause as he reconsiders, “Well actually I know that your friends are vocal about how suspicious I am. I can’t say that my family is different.”

Rook slowly realizes why he’s calling them out of nowhere. It’s close to two in the morning and if Jacob has a restless day where things don’t go too well, his mind takes a bad path.

“Did you have another nightmare?” They ask before they could think this through.

“Yeah,” he said, “I do, um, like having you with me.”

“How so, like a pet?” Rook keeps their voice calm because they still don’t know if they completely hated being with Jacob.

“I appreciated it whenever you woke me up before,” he trails off but Rook waits, “before it gets worse. So no, I don’t like you as a pet. You’re certainly more than that.”

Rook stares up at the moon. It takes them a few times to think of something to say, “Thanks.”

“You’re thanking me?” Confused, he continues, “I basically said you’re not a pet. I mean, I do mean the sentiment but like, I really could’ve said this all better.”

“Please don’t judge me on being a bad conversationalist. You just admitted that you’re no good either.”

He huffs, “True. What I’m trying to say is that each night with me, you could’ve killed me. You had plenty of chances to attack me but instead you woke me up from my nightmares. This is a hell of a bond we have.”

To be completely honest, it was never Rook’s intention to kill Jacob during those wolf days. They’re aware of that a way to end this war is to kill the Seeds but now they’re confident they can’t do it.

Eventually Rook said, “That really was you in the bliss with Faith. You helped me leave the city.”

“No I just helped you on a train of thought. Everything else was your own doing.”

“What in the world are you even doing, Jacob?” Rook recalled the questions he once asked them. “You can’t be Joseph’s Herald and be _something_ with me.”

He doesn’t respond just like how Rook didn’t give answer to about their loyalties. But for Rook’s case, of course they were going to eventually get away. Rook may have a crazy life but they would never betray the resistance.

But Rook knows that they can’t kill Jacob Seed.

His silence just confuses Rook more. It could mean nothing and everything until this waiting game is over.

“I know you’re still awake Jacob,” Rook said, petting Boomer to feel less lonely. “Whatever you decide to do, I hope we both make it out alive. Yeah this sounds dramatic but like, this whole damn world is crazy. I have the ability to change my body but I can’t really control it sometimes. I just trust my body whenever it shifts without my awareness. That night, after the fight and shifting in my sleep, I guess I just trust you.”

It comes low and barely hearable but Jacob asks, “Why?”

“Do you remember the gauze thing tied to my radio? I wrote something there, well it’s faded by now but it says-”

“Bigger than the moon,” he said before Rook could.

“Jacob, do you have it right now?”

“No,” he said a little too fast, “but if I do?”

“I want it back,” Rook stated. “Anyway, that little saying or motto, whatever, it’s been the one thing no one can take away from me. Those words are mine and it makes me want to grow. I like to think I have.”

_(I will be bigger, Rook promised, but I cannot grow here)_

Rook wants to say more, perhaps they are as their tongue feels dryer and their eyelids are getting heavy. They remember the first night they were alone in the city, they didn’t know whether to cry or keep running. There were times where they just sat on the sidewalk and everyone else ignored them but when they do notice Rook, it was all mocks and scowls.

These were the memories Faith brought up.

From John, he goes more on the semi-official stuff on Rook.

He brings up statements and reports where Rook fought someone or stole something and how Rook always ran away. And then he starts reading police records on drug busts, each one including at least someone Rook knew. Hearing the aftermath of them made Rook want to run, they just don’t know in which direction.

_(No, Rook angered, but we are a part of it)_

“I don’t want to go back there,” Rook mumbles, eyes closed with a weak grip on the radio. “I left them and they don’t want me back.”

“Were they your family?”

They could barely make out Jacob’s voice now. It’s just a nice sound.

“I thought we could be but,” Rook tries to say but they can’t tell if it came out at all, “we were so small. The city’s so big. We fell apart. I ran and ran and ran.”

“Do you miss them?”

Rook could feel their eyes water and chill up from the cold air, “A fucking lot.” The teardrops slide down their cheeks and when it reaches their chin, Rook murmurs, “But I don’t regret leaving. I couldn’t change or help them. I didn’t want to watch any longer. There was only one plan left. I had to only care about myself and start anew.”

The entire county lulls into a peaceful silence for Rook as their mind is weighted with the feather of sleep.

“That’s really,” Jacob said softly, “that must have been a war, both in the city and in your mind.”

Their waking world closes, once more, with Jacob’s voice. They kind of like it.

 

 

 

The Resistance is doing very, very swell. The amount of swell is equal to Rook’s suspicion that something bad will happen.

Rook only thinks this because their late night conversations with Jacob are becoming more infrequent. Maybe it’s not the wisest thing to keep in contact with him but they both lean their topics away from any like war secrets.

Jacob just talks about old war stories or something pleasant from his childhood. Rook offers up more or less the same thing but plus wolf shenanigans. It’s just nice to get away from everything for just a moment before sleep.

But then it’s three nights in a row without any response from Jacob’s channel.

They tried looking for him, knowing he was last seen in John’s region, but the Baptist keeps poking jabs at their relationship with Jacob. At worst John is just whiny over how Rook’s showing favoritism.

When Rook savages around Faith’s region, she’s more on the happy side about them and Jacob getting along. Again she talks about how great it would be when Rook joins the family as she sends bliss after them.

The rest of Hope County can only sympathize with Rook on this level of drama. It makes sense that the Seed family is obsessed with them, the harbinger and hero rolled into one.

_(Are wolves to be executioners?)_

_(Are wolves to be chasers?)_

_(Are wolves to be the consequences of lies?)_

As for Deputies Hudson and Pratt, they are the first and only people that see how well Rook is taking all of this.

“I can’t take any more of this,” Rook whines, pulling at their furred ears. “Like, you guys sense this bad vibe too right?”

Joey and Staci share a look. Joey scrunches up her face, rubbing her chin, “Either this is a werewolf thing or you’re just worried over Jacob.”

“Could be both,” said Staci. Before Rook could pace more circles in their shared prison cell, he said a more reasonable guess. “Okay so this war has been going for a long time and the Seeds are almost pushed to their bunkers. We have to suspect they’re still planning something big as a last resort.”

“And you’re their number one problem,” Joey points at them. “You annoyed the hell out of them, made their older brother give up his power, and you’ve been trailblazing through this entire place with your animals.”

“Best pack ever,” Staci nodded.

It has been great running with Peaches, Boomer, and Hamburger. Rook scratches at their right arm, “You guys are a part of it too.”

They kind of mumble it but the two deputies grin at the junior.

“They do like us!” Joey swings an arm around Rook’s shoulders to lock them in for a noogie.

Staci gives a friendly pat on the back, “But really Rook, I think you’re just worried about Jacob.”

Rook doesn’t have the heart to deny that. They were open about Jacob calling them almost every night, thinking that the deputies could knock sense into their head but they were just as curious as Rook to see where this was going.

“He hasn’t officially turned nor has he officially helped us,” Rook said. “All Jacob’s been doing is just watch out for me or give me more openings.”

“Rookie, he’s the one who’s been finding you wolfed and blissed out and carry you to us,” Joey said. “This is a mighty fine gentleman if I didn’t know better, but we all know better, _don’t we?”_

Now this is the real predicament as Rook and Staci share a look. The two of them got different sides of Jacob when they got captured. Staci avoids radios as much as possible but when the beginning notes of _Only You_ starts playing, it takes a lot of effort to minimize the damage. Rook wants the puke when they think about how the man they have late night talks with made their friend into a monster.

Oh hell, they know the horrible story of Jacob Seed. They pity him, fear and empathize, care about him and hate him for being horrible. No pain of the city compares to the anguish in Rook’s heart when they think about Jacob. It’s a scary thought to know how important he became to them.

Do they care about Jacob for the wrong reasons or the right reasons? Will there ever be a moral justification for not stopping this man?

Rook is asking all these questions because they know they already decided to keep Jacob alive. They’re willing to deal with the consequences.

It was only a matter of time for the fight Rook anticipated for.

They trusted Jacob too easily, thinking the mountain region was truly safe. A well place shot of a bliss bullet hurts more than Rook’s neck as they see red hair in the distance as they collapse.

It’s the same damn cage that locked up the rebellious wolf when Rook opens their eyes. Cold and sore and a little bit delirious as they see the one person they wanted to see least than Jacob.

Joseph Seed stands in front of the bars, blocking the sun’s harsh light and giving him an ethereal glow. He looks down at Rook’s curled up body and holds his hands in prayer.

“My child,” he said with that certainty that the end will come to all, “you are the one destined to fight us. This is your role, to cause unrest to everything we work towards but it’s over now. Surrender Rook, you will be a part of our family, just as God has intended.”

It’s been a while since Rook heard Joseph’s preaches. There was only one way for them respond.

“Jesus fucking Christ, will you ever stop?”

“I’ll stop when you do.”

The crazy thing is Rook believes him on that. The fighting and the resistance could all end by Rook’s decision and that kind of power is big and comes with a responsibility. This confrontation, destined or coincidental, began with Joseph Seed and Rook Wolfe and must end the same way.

Rook rises to their feet, “I’m going to grow and fight and you can never stop that Joseph.”

He leans in close and only the cage stops him from pressing their foreheads together, “Why can’t you behave? Your sin of pride is what’s stopping yourself from having the family you belong with.”

“I don’t belong with you,” they growled, ignoring the familiar pit of insecurities and hopelessness that comes with that line.

“But you do,” he insists. “Why else have you developed a certain kinship with Jacob?”

Joseph’s smile is unsettling because he’s enjoying Rook’s silence, unable to defend this bond with Jacob. They already made their peace on it but they can’t lie on how strong it is.

“You want Jacob,” he continues, “but you’re doing the selfish thing of taking him away from us.”

“He can decide on his own where he wants to go,” Rook said. They don’t even know where that direction would be.

Joseph takes a few steps back, “The time he was separated from our family was torture for him, he called for us in his nightmare and he found his role here with Eden’s Gate, with us. We are his family, his everything, and you’re influencing him to join you off the right path.

“I’ve been setting him back on his course and as I fear, you were always in his thoughts. You are baiting him with the idea to question our ways. I must set you both on your roles and now I see that there’s only one way to tame your pride.”

Cold fear scratches Rook’s brain to know Jacob has been getting special prayer treatment. It is way worse than when Jacob got the damning tattoos or fought off deranged angels for Rook. Joseph, with all of his insanity, is intelligent. It only takes staring into Rook’s eyes to find what they hold dear.

“What did you do to him?” Rook didn’t care that they snarled at the ever tranquil man.

“I reminded him of our family, our life, why everything we’ve endured is for us to survive by God’s will. Now I wish for you to join us but if you don’t then Jacob is back to where he started, with our family.” Joseph begins to walk away, “Go find him, Rook, for only he will be the one to put an end to your sins.”

This felt strangely like the very beginning.

Joseph Seed is walking away with absolute certainty that God won’t let him die while Rook’s nerves are humming the song of primal survival, to fight and protect, to challenge and spite, and it all circles around the words of a wolf.

 _Bigger than the moon_ , a little child once thought, to finally feel like the world won’t eat them up. They don’t want anyone else to ever feel as small as them.

Kicking the cage door was easier than expected since it was unlocked. Rook ignores the frustrated embarrassment in favor on just escaping the Veterans Center. A quick look around tells that peggies have taken back this part of the mountain overnight. As quickly as they could, Rook takes down a few soldiers and takes their guns without alerting the others patrolling.

They have to find Jacob because whatever Joseph did, Rook won’t waste a second on curiosity, they have to find Jacob. If it’s a risk, they don’t care.

Rook run and run across the mountain region, shooting down soldiers and angels. No wolves in sight.

The sun starts to sink into a pink and orange sky when the radio acts up.

“Pup,” Jacob said and as much as Rook wants to start yelling, they notice this is a public channel. The other Seeds are listening in, “I always knew you’re a good soldier. Now be my best soldier and find me, I’m waiting for you.”

“You always are,” Rook radios in as they trek up the mountain.

There’s a pattern, a trail almost, of soldiers with higher grade weapons. Logic dictates that this amount of rocket launchers and machine guns is separating them from Jacob. After all, only the Seeds can be this dangerous and extra.

As Rook hides behind a boulder, pinned by hail of bullets, Dutch calls them.

“Hey Rook, what fucking mess are you in now?”

“I’m climbing the mountain to face off with Jacob.”

“Good luck, kid, especially after that message from Joseph.”

Rook takes a shot once the bullets stop and catches the gunner reloading. The gunner falls dead as Rook rushes off to another cover spot, rising up the incline.

“Can you recap it for me? I was knocked out for a bit and now, well, guns,” they hissed, firing at another squad.

“Oh, the usual prayer bullshit, but he more or less said that you’ll join his family or Jacob will kill you.”

“What!” Rook ran and duked under a fallen tree as a rocket launched at their previous spot, “Again?”

“It’s how I interpret it,” Dutch blatantly said. “So what are you gonna do kid, something impossible?”

“Honestly, something stupid.”

Rook peers up to peak of the mountain and there stands Jacob on a ledge. They could barely make out his face but that doesn’t help the dread swelling up their chest. That clutch on their heart and the anxiety swirling in their head, it all pressure that’s too hard to ignore.

_(They hunt and they kill and they run and run)_

They make it up the mountain, taking down the last of the soldiers as the sun finally dips down.

Now face to face, guns in hand but not aimed, Jacob looks almost drained or uneasy. He’s frowning like Rook really is the chaos bringer of his order.

Maybe that is right because Rook can’t handle the silence any longer.

“Congrats Jacob,” Rook stomps right up to him, tossing the gun away. They don’t need any other weapon than the body they grow with. “I can’t kill you.”

“You finally admit it,” he scowls and his gun is still aimed down, “and why is that? Because you’re a hero? Because you’re good and I’m bad?”

“Because I want you in my life,” Rook said honestly, “I’m not killing you and I’m not running away.”

It felt like so long since Rook got to see Jacob’s face. He’s been keeping a straight face but there’s always that frustrated sadness in his eyes. But then Jacob frowns at Rook’s commitment.

“I hurt your family and you’ve hurt him. Rook, if I bring you to Joseph, you won’t ever be the same. I already made my family think I’m straying and they won’t,” he begins to stamper, shaking his head and breathing a little too fast, “I know the John and Joseph I grew up with. They are gone, I couldn’t protect them. And now seeing them like this, with Faith, I don’t want to lose them but I know I already did.”

Jacob drops the gun, claws at his hair where it’s matted to his sweaty forehead. Rook is instantly there for him, weaving their fingers together and tilting his head to look into their eyes.

“You’re hoping,” Rook swallowed down bad memories, “and that’s not a bad thing. You hope that the people around you can be saved, that maybe you could save them if you stick by their side. And you try and you try everything to help when no other help ever comes but nothing works and the people you want to call your family are losing their selves. They change into something you can’t recognize and you have to wonder if you’re the same case.”

“I love them Rook,” Jacob squeezes his eyes tight, no tears but he’s overwhelmed, either by Rook’s empathy or by his own bad memories of hopelessness. “We started this because we love each other and then we started this war and you came along.”

“Yeah, yeah just blame me,” Rook laughs softly, “I’m just the chaos to your order.”

“Not me,” Jacob takes a breath to slow down. He opens his eyes and he’s not sad, he’s scared. “Joseph wants me to make you obedient,” he has a shaky grip on their hands, “and John wants you complicit and Faith wants you happy in the worst ways. I don’t want you in my family and be a part of this pain. Rook, my family, our love, it is strong and painful.”

Rook lightly smacked Jacob’s head, “You were with Faith in the bliss. You saw the love and pain I surrounded myself in. I told you what I did, you saw me leave the city because I couldn’t help anyone. I ran away from what I couldn’t change and it wasn’t my place to make them change. Jacob, I told you, I’m not running away from you but I’m not changing you either. I don’t want to lose you.”

Like that night ago in his bedroom, the same moon shining in his eyes, Jacob asks, “Why?”

_(Rook askes, why did you chase me?)_

“Jacob, I trust you as an equal and I’m tired of seeing the people I care about cross the point of no return,” they let one hand go to hold his cheek. He ever so slightly leans into the touch and Rook’s heart swells.

Jacob closes his eyes again, as if to deny Rook’s truth. “What do you expect from me?”

_(Rook askes, why did you bite me?)_

“Jacob, I just want you in my life or at least alive. I’m sorry if I’m making you realize your doubt in your family but even you got to admit that love is chaotic.” They hope they’re making sense as they sort of make the implication that they, as chaos, are also love.

Jacob brushes Rook’s hands away and to hold their face in his palms. As always, his hands are so warm despite the cold air. Rook lets their eyes fall shut, barely catching his gaze.

Jacob asks one last thing, “How are we going to survive this fucking mess?”

_(Rook askes, why are you letting me go?)_

“I do have one stupid idea. It’s only an offer, really, and it’s all your choice.” They’re eyes are still closed but they feel their way to Jacob’s right arm. Tracing the thin font of the carved sins brings nauseous memories to their head.

Rook guides Jacob’s hands to trace over their right arm, to feel the marred skin of the bite mark.

They wait and wait for Jacob to say anything as he holds Rook’s arm, making his choice.

“Pup,” he finally said and Rook opens their eyes.

Jacob had always looked so tormented after each nightmare and Rook could never really bring him any ease, it was something they couldn’t help with. Right now, Jacob is filled with confliction and confusion from everything that Rook is but he thought it over.

“My life has been nothing but love and pain,” he said, “I still see my brothers as the scared boys I failed to protect and now it’s far too late to justify our pain and love.”

He’s tried of the nightmares of war and he made his peace with them. But with his family of war and Rook’s offer, maybe this can work.

“Will this work?” Jacob asked, “You’ve never done this before.”

“Do you trust me?” Rook and threw off their shirt. Just when they’re about to shuck off the pants, Jacob coughed loudly. “I ruined a lot of clothes when shifting and I know you’re fond of that jacket.”

Jacob rolled his eyes and followed their lead. He actually folded up his army jacket and studied his dog tags before gently laying it on top. By then, Rook had easily shifted before his eyes yet again, underneath the bright pale moon.

“Rook, I do trust you,” he answers, “I know this won’t give me a new life. But one day, I will feel new.”

He takes a breath and presents his right arm to the wolf.

Their voice, uneven and inhuman, “We will be bigger than the moon.”

Rook bites down into the sins, the flesh paper thin, and the bones thud against fangs. Blood spills out and drips out into their throat and as much as they hate the taste, they know they have to keep their teeth in for a few seconds longer.

It’s instinct telling them what to do, trusting their body that a few seconds longer, a few more seconds of causing Jacob Seed the most intense pain they know that courses over their body whenever shifting becomes too much. The man is at his knees, gritting his teeth and there’s a hint of him trapping a scream in his gut. The moment he’s about to collapse, Rook lets go.

It’s done. Whatever this ritual or test, it’s done and there’s just a deep certainty in their head that just knows that it worked.

Jacob takes his time to get the night air back into his lungs. His whole body is shaking and his arm is soaked in his blood but Rook just knows the bleeding stops.

And then Jacob lifts his head up to stare at Rook and he’s smiling.

That’s when he shifts.

The bones reconstruct, the muscles rearrange, the fur grows out, and Jacob is keeping his eyes on Rook.

As terrifying as it is to be on this side of the mirror, Rook is proud.

His complete look is beautiful, dark grey fur with a collar of dark brown. Jacob stands confidently at Rook’s height and they both grin at each other.

They just crash their nose into Jacob’s neck, rubbing their face with his and there’s this feeling of acceptance and, oh hell yeah Jacob wants to be a part of their life!

“You’re really sure about this?” Rook laughs, not too sure if this is a question or an exclamation.

“I’m a fucking wolf, Rook!” Jacob caterwauls and head-butts Rook, propping his arms over Rook’s shoulders. It’s very awkwardly balanced and they both just topple over each other. “My sureness is pretty self-evident.”

“I can barely understand us,” they admitted. Suddenly their radio, somewhere in the pile of their clothes, sparked up. “I better get that.” As they shift back to have regular vocal chords, Joseph’s frustrated complaints continue to try to provoke anything from Rook.

They raise the radio to their lips, “Jacob Seed is no longer with you.”

Rook more or less ignores Joseph’s frantic shouts, his attempt to voice his anger in an almost tranquil way. They watch the wolf nose into his army jacket to pick up something and plop it into Rook’s lap.

Their thumb brushes over the old gauze and the words _bigger than the moon_.

Jacob tests out his own voice, howling at the small moon above.

Rook can’t help but smile.

 

 

 

This new life is all about adjustment.

It’s safer if Jacob remains as a wolf for the time being now that Herald Jacob is dead and Rook is seen wearing his signature jacket.

Is it a prize or a claim? Rook won’t tell and let’s everyone else make assumptions.

Only the two deputies know the truth the moment Rook is back with a very big wolf with intelligent eyes.

Staci is terrified and confused because his and Jacob’s roles are in reversed. He trusts Rook though so Rook is doing their absolute best to help Staci realize that Jacob is on their side.

For Joey, she only known second hand accounts on Jacob Seed and she’s the one to whack Rook’s head on this stupid, risky plan. She tolerates him, especially when Jacob would always bring Rook back to base when they walk.

It’s a process and Rook just trusts their gut. They trust Jacob as a wolf with this new power and in return Jacob trusts them.

On the rare nights where Jacob shifts back into human form, he’s still troubled about fighting on this side of the war. But it’s to keep Rook alive, he always assures, to keep Rook in his life in the way they’re meant to be.

It’s not the end or the beginning but this change in both of their lives is something they want to experience together.

 

 

 

_For who would help a wolf?_

_Only those who would chase them._

_Like a child's promise, become bigger than the moon._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic escalated for me, like, I thought it would be just a werewolf fic??? Like I based this off a tumblr post ffs omg. And I loved every minute writing this too so that's great! I'm just surprised I finished this honestly. Oh and I'm caught up with that ending of Far Cry and like, no I'm sad, I love these characters, why is this happening. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading, I hoped you all enjoyed this ride!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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